Jeff Miller

May 18, 2025

The Heart of the Law

Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery - Part 2

Jeff Miller

May 18, 2025

The Heart of the Law

Introduction:

Two Problems Jesus Has with Divorce (Matthew 5:31–32):

Divorce TRIVIALIZES MARRIAGE. (Matt 5:31)
Genesis 2:24 – Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.

Deuteronomy 24:1–4 – When a man takes a wife and marries her, if then she finds no favor in his eyes because he has found some indecency in her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out of his house, and she departs out of his house, and if she goes and becomes another man’s wife, and the latter man hates her and writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out of his house, or if the latter man dies, who took her to be his wife, then her former husband, who sent her away, may not take her again to be his wife, after she has been defiled, for that is an abomination before the LORD. And you shall not bring sin upon the land that the LORD your God is giving you for an inheritance.
Divorce RESULTS In ADULTERY. (Matt 5:32)
Ephesians 5:24–25 – Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her...

Sermon Notes (PDF): BLANK
Hint: Highlight blanks above for answers!

00:00-00:02
Matthew chapter five, are you there?
00:04-00:12
This section we are in on the Sermon on the Mount is about the heart of God's law.
00:13-00:21
And we saw that Jesus said, "I didn't come to abolish the law or destroy the law." That's what we would call the Old Testament.
00:22-00:33
Jesus said, "I didn't come to do away with the Old Testament." He said, "I came to carry out everything that was said in it." It's not irrelevant at all.
00:34-01:04
And through this section, you're going to see, as we've already seen many times, Jesus says, "You have heard that it was said, "but I say to you." And when Jesus says that, what he's saying is, "You've lowered God's standard." And Jesus is correcting them, and he's correcting us when we take the word of God and just make it purely external.
01:06-01:07
God wants your heart.
01:10-01:11
God wants your heart.
01:12-01:14
That's what we saw a couple of weeks ago.
01:14-01:23
Pastor Taylor taught us, you know, Jesus said, "Murder isn't just the physical act of killing someone.
01:23-01:32
"It's a heart issue." We saw last week, adultery is not just the physical act, it's a heart issue.
01:34-01:44
And in these verses we're looking at today, Jesus is continuing His teaching on the destructiveness of adultery.
01:46-01:49
And today, we're gonna talk about divorce.
01:52-02:00
And look, there's so much controversy on this topic.
02:04-02:11
And if we're going to be honest, the controversy doesn't come really from God's word because the Bible is clear.
02:15-02:27
The reason there's so much controversy is because if you are a divorced person, This gets very personal.
02:29-02:30
And it gets very painful.
02:33-02:41
And look, I've done so many weddings over the past 20 some years, so many weddings.
02:41-02:49
And I can tell you emphatically that nobody gets into marriage wanting a divorce.
02:51-02:52
It doesn't happen.
02:53-03:12
I've never seen the wedding ceremony where the vows include something like, "I can't wait to be done with you." Or, "I love you today, but in six months, I will hate you more than anybody on the planet." Nobody thinks that.
03:12-03:14
Nobody expects that.
03:14-03:20
And when divorce happens, it's always, it's just always so painful.
03:23-03:34
And we get through a passage like this, and look, I know some of you are going to be tempted to tune out, because you're going to think, well, you know what, Jeff, you don't know my circumstances.
03:37-03:38
And you're right, I don't.
03:40-03:42
I don't know your circumstances.
03:43-03:53
And I'm certainly not trying to be dismissive of the pain that you've gone through, and I'm certainly not trying to be judgmental for what brought about your divorce, if that's your situation.
03:55-04:01
And I'm also keenly aware that I cannot exhaust everything that the Bible says on the subject in just one sermon.
04:04-04:12
What I want us all to do, it's nothing new, I just want us to do what we do every week.
04:12-04:19
We're just gonna take a giant step back And we're going to see what our Lord says on the subject.
04:20-04:27
And we're going to see Jesus speaks on divorce here.
04:32-04:39
And I can't undo anything that happened in the past, nor can you as much as we might want to.
04:42-04:43
It's gone.
04:44-04:54
But I'm hoping with this message that we can prevent any future pain and hurt that comes from divorce.
04:56-04:59
So let's look at Matthew chapter five, look at verses 31 and 32.
05:01-05:10
Jesus says, "It was also said, "whoever divorces his wife, "let him give her a certificate of divorce.
05:12-05:25
"But I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife except on the ground of sexual immorality makes her commit adultery.
05:26-05:35
And whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery." What is going on in these verses?
05:36-05:38
Well, first of all, look at verse 31.
05:38-05:43
Jesus says, "It was also said," what?
05:43-05:52
Jesus gives a quote, "Whoever divorces his wife, "let him give her a certificate of divorce." You're like, is that what the Old Testament says?
05:58-05:59
Ish.
06:02-06:03
Here's the problem.
06:06-06:19
This statement was used by the scribes and the Pharisees as a gross misrepresentation of a passage in the Old Testament.
06:21-06:22
So does the Old Testament say that?
06:22-06:31
Yeah, it kind of does, but they took it a direction that the Lord never intended it to go.
06:33-06:42
The scribes and the Pharisees took a passage Deuteronomy, we're gonna look at here in a few moments, and they twisted it for their own purposes.
06:45-06:52
Jesus says, "But I say to you," and this is one of the most difficult verses in your Bible.
06:55-07:11
Jesus says, "I say, everyone who divorces his wife "except on the grounds of sexual immorality "makes her commit adultery." And whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.
07:15-07:17
So here's the short version.
07:19-07:25
See the scribes and the Pharisees, as I said, twisted this passage in Deuteronomy and they reduced it to this.
07:26-07:32
Look, divorce and remarriage is okay as long as it's legal.
07:33-07:38
As long as you do the paperwork, it's fine.
07:39-07:40
It's just fine.
07:40-07:41
It is just fine.
07:43-07:53
And I think it's obvious that Jesus did not agree with their assessment because he said, divorce leads to adultery.
07:56-07:57
That's the short version.
07:59-08:01
So let's unpack that a little bit today.
08:01-08:10
And on your outline, excuse me, or just very simply calling this two problems Jesus has with divorce.
08:10-08:13
All right, let's look at these two verses very intently.
08:13-08:17
And we see there's two problems that Jesus has with divorce.
08:18-08:22
And number one, write this down, divorce trivializes marriage.
08:28-08:29
Divorce trivializes marriage.
08:30-08:31
That's the problem.
08:35-08:44
Quick review, marriage was defined once and for all to the first two people that God created, Adam and Eve.
08:45-08:47
And I know there have been attempts to redefine marriage.
08:50-08:50
Doesn't matter.
08:51-08:53
God defined marriage once and for all.
08:53-09:03
With the first two people that he created, Adam and Eve, And the most important verse in your Bible on marriage is Genesis 2:24.
09:05-09:18
It says, "Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh." That's the most important verse in the Bible about marriage.
09:19-09:39
And I can say that emphatically because when Jesus was asked about marriage and divorce, this was the verse he quoted, Matthew 19, Mark 10, when the apostle Paul was writing about marriage and divorce and husband and wife issues, this was the verse he quoted, 1 Corinthians 6, Ephesians 5.
09:39-09:47
God's plan in marriage is two people turning into one person.
09:48-09:49
That's the plan.
09:50-09:53
There's not a relationship on the earth like that.
09:54-09:56
Not a business partnership.
09:58-09:59
Not members of a sports team.
10:00-10:03
There's nothing like the marriage relationship.
10:03-10:06
This was God's intention of marriage in the very beginning.
10:06-10:09
I want two people to turn into one person.
10:14-10:23
And when you study Genesis, you'll see divorce was never part of God's original design for marriage.
10:25-10:30
Like, all right, well, if it wasn't part of God's plan, where did divorce come from?
10:32-10:34
Where did this idea for divorce come from?
10:35-10:43
Well, allowance was made for divorce in the Old Testament law.
10:45-10:47
I want you to look at this, we'll put this passage on the screen.
10:47-10:57
I want you to look at it very closely because this is the passage that's in question here where Jesus is confronting the scribes and the Pharisees.
10:58-10:59
This is from Deuteronomy 24.
11:01-11:40
Says, again, Law of Moses here, "When a man takes a wife and marries her, "If then she finds no favor in his eyes because he has found some indecency in her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out of his house, and she departs out of his house, and then she goes and becomes another man's wife, and the latter man hates her and writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out of his house.
11:42-12:04
Or if the latter man dies, who took her to be his wife, then her former husband, who sent her away, that's husband number one, may not take her again to be his wife after she has been defiled, for that is an abomination before the Lord.
12:05-12:11
And you shall not bring sin upon the land that the Lord your God is giving you for an inheritance.
12:15-12:20
Now listen, it's a tough passage, but we're going to get through this together.
12:23-12:25
Here's what Moses was saying.
12:27-12:30
Divorce had to have a cause.
12:31-12:35
And here it's defined in the law as some quotes, indecency.
12:35-12:41
It could have been a natural or a moral or a physical defect or whatever.
12:41-12:48
It had to be something that they categorized as unclean, whatever that is.
12:51-12:56
This limited the possible reasons for divorce.
12:56-12:58
This was the purpose, understand.
12:59-13:06
The reason Moses wrote this law was so that a man couldn't just divorce his wife for any reason whatsoever.
13:07-13:10
You know, just make up some excuse, something frivolous.
13:11-13:15
You know, I'm just divorcing you because I feel like it.
13:15-13:23
You know, I don't like the meatloaf you made, or I don't like your new haircut, or, you know, those shoes look horrible.
13:24-13:27
You can't just willy-nilly divorce your wife.
13:27-13:33
Moses is saying, look, there has to be a reason for the divorce.
13:34-13:38
So this was actually to emphasize the importance of marriage.
13:39-13:42
Like, well, why would he allow the divorce then?
13:43-13:44
Why go through this?
13:45-13:46
Don't miss this.
13:48-13:55
The purpose of divorce in this case in Deuteronomy 24 was to protect the woman.
13:59-14:16
You see, when you give her the certificate of divorce, that woman had legal proof that, listen, she was dismissed from the marriage, but it was not because she was unfaithful.
14:19-14:25
You see, that certificate for the woman showed, look, I did not have an affair.
14:30-14:37
My husband found something wrong with me and dismissed me, but it wasn't because I was unfaithful.
14:39-14:41
That's what's going on in Deuteronomy 24.
14:43-14:48
But I want you to see here, listen, because this is where the Pharisees and the scribes missed it.
14:49-14:55
In Deuteronomy 24, there is not a command to divorce.
14:57-15:01
That passage is just simply describing a scenario.
15:03-15:11
In that passage, if we're gonna boil it down, we would say this, they were told to write a certificate of divorce if there was a divorce.
15:12-15:19
The only command that you see in this passage, the only one in that passage is this.
15:19-15:24
If you divorce your wife, you cannot take her back if she's rejected by her next husband.
15:26-15:29
Or if he croaks, you cannot take her back.
15:33-15:36
Again, the reason for this was to protect the woman.
15:39-15:45
It was to keep women from being used and discarded.
15:50-16:03
It was to keep men who are hogs, admittedly, it's to keep men from saying, you know what, I'm going to try out women.
16:05-16:06
But you know what?
16:06-16:10
My first wife was better than this one.
16:11-16:16
So I'm going to get rid of her and I'm gonna take the first one back because I preferred her.
16:17-16:21
That's a horrible, horrible way to treat a woman.
16:23-16:24
And see, that's the heart of the law here.
16:24-16:25
Like God's like, no, no, no, no, no.
16:25-16:28
You're not gonna treat women that way, men.
16:30-16:32
This isn't a high school relationship.
16:33-16:36
boyfriend, girlfriend, on again, off again.
16:36-16:37
No, no, no, no, no.
16:37-16:39
We're not treating women like that.
16:40-16:48
Marriage is a very serious covenant and you're not gonna just have a woman on a leash where you let her go and yank her back and let her go and yank her back.
16:48-16:51
No, you are not allowed to do that.
16:53-16:54
That's the heart of the law here.
16:57-17:03
Deuteronomy 24 was intended to stop divorce from happening willy-nilly.
17:04-17:06
Everybody on board with me now?
17:07-17:13
Okay, because now I want you to see how the scribes and the Pharisees twisted it.
17:13-17:16
Look at verse 31 again in Matthew chapter five.
17:17-17:17
Jesus quotes them.
17:17-17:40
He says, "It was also said, whoever divorces his wife, "let him give her a certificate of divorce." What the scribes and the Pharisees did was, Through their twisting this passage, they actually made it say the opposite of what God intended.
17:40-17:45
They used this passage to justify easy divorce.
17:46-17:53
That you can get a divorce for any reason at all, so long as the paperwork is done.
17:56-17:58
That's what they reduced this to.
17:59-18:09
Like, well, look, you studied the Old Testament, It tells you very plainly, if you get a divorce, make sure that all the documents are filled out appropriately.
18:12-18:14
And that's really all that matters, right?
18:14-18:15
That's all that matters.
18:16-18:22
Just that we signed on the right line and we crossed our Ts and we dotted our Is.
18:22-18:23
That's really what matters.
18:23-18:31
And as long as you do the paperwork, as long as the divorce is legal, hey, everybody's good with that because everything's above board then, right?
18:31-18:36
I mean, I'm not like one of those, I'm not like one of those illegal divorcers, right?
18:37-18:49
You know, that I get some, that I get some janky, unofficial, illegal divorce document from online, from the dark webs.
18:50-18:51
I'm not like that guy.
18:53-18:55
You better be sure that when I get a divorce, it's done right.
18:57-18:58
That was their mindset.
18:59-19:04
The law of Moses commands divorce to be done legally, so make sure that you do it right.
19:06-19:10
And see, that's Jesus' problem with their attitude.
19:11-19:14
He says, "Your attitude about divorce trivializes marriage.
19:16-19:27
"And you have justified in your minds "the mistreatment of women in the name of making sure "the paperwork is filled out properly." That's not what the law's about, Jesus is saying.
19:31-19:40
Now, over the years, I have heard all kinds of unbiblical justifications for people wanting a divorce.
19:42-19:44
And I don't even have time to get into all that today.
19:46-19:48
And we're going to get to the biblical reason for divorce in a moment.
19:51-20:35
We need to stop here and say, "Listen, marriage should not be taken so lightly among God's people. The scribes and the Pharisees were so diligent to make sure that the divorce was done right. We, church, should be so diligent to make sure that the marriage is done right. So that's the first problem Jesus has with divorce. You trivialize marriage. You trivialize marriage. Not on board with that, but Here's the second problem Jesus says I have with your attitude towards divorce, scribes, Pharisees, church in 2025, divorce results in adultery.
20:40-20:41
Look at verse 32 again.
20:42-20:47
Like I said, this is a difficult verse, but this is what our Lord said.
20:49-21:04
Jesus said, "But I say to you, that everyone who divorces his wife, except on the ground of sexual immorality, makes her commit adultery.
21:08-21:29
And whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery." So Jesus is saying, listen, with divorce, even when the paperwork is done properly, divorce leads to nothing but more and more adultery.
21:34-21:48
And I think one of the troubling things about this passage is I could see in my mind that I make choices that cause me to be guilty and suffer consequences for my own choices.
21:48-21:58
But it's very clear here in verse 32, Jesus is saying that a choice for a divorce results in other people being guilty of sin.
22:00-22:02
That's a tough pill to swallow, but that's what he said.
22:05-22:06
What does he mean?
22:06-22:22
Well, in Deuteronomy 24, that passage we just looked at, when the woman was divorced for something less than sexual immorality, which by the way, sexual immorality breaks the bond of marriage.
22:22-22:27
But in the Deuteronomy 24 case, she was divorced for something less than that, right?
22:29-22:45
Jesus said, "Even when you divorce for less than sexual immorality, that still makes for an adulterous situation." Jesus said, "The divorced wife moves on, she consummates a new union when there was no grounds to break the first one.
22:45-22:50
And if you do that, if you divorce like that, you are now guilty of adultery.
22:51-22:54
And whoever marries that woman is guilty of adultery.
22:54-22:58
And whoever marries you is guilty of adultery.
22:58-23:13
Jesus is saying when you unbiblically break the marriage covenant and people go off and get remarried, he says now we've resulted in more and more adultery happening in other people.
23:13-23:14
That's what he said.
23:17-23:26
He says, "Now everybody's guilty." So what Jesus is saying to the scribes and the Pharisees is that you could sit here and say, "Oh, I'm not an adulterer.
23:27-23:33
"I have never, I have never "slept with another man's wife.
23:33-23:40
"I have never committed adultery." Jesus says, "You shouldn't think that way.
23:41-23:57
"Actually, you've made adultery worse because you have such a shallow view of divorce." Jesus said, "You lowered God's standard because all you're focused on is the external." I didn't commit adultery.
23:58-23:59
Jesus said, "You did.
24:00-24:03
You commit adultery when you look at a woman lustfully.
24:03-24:06
It proves that you already had adultery in your heart.
24:06-24:13
And furthermore, when you divorce without biblical grounds, which Jesus says is sexual immorality.
24:13-24:32
Jesus said, "You have committed adultery and you've made her and you made her new husband commit adultery too." Your sin not only affects you, but it affects so many more people than just you.
24:34-24:42
And I really don't have to sell people who have experienced divorce, how far reaching the damage goes.
24:43-24:49
The pain is not limited to just the two people in the marriage.
24:56-24:58
I mentioned biblical grounds for divorce.
25:01-25:14
Biblically, now looking at the whole counsel of God, Biblically, I believe that there is one grounds, one biblical grounds for divorce, and it's hard-heartedness.
25:19-25:20
You're like, well, wait, wait, wait, wait.
25:21-25:22
How do you know when somebody's hard-hearted?
25:23-25:25
'Cause it'd be real easy, right?
25:25-25:27
They're like, I'm divorcing you because I think you're hard-hearted.
25:28-25:30
Like, how do you know that somebody is hard-hearted?
25:32-25:37
Well, biblically, hardheartedness in a marriage manifests in two ways.
25:40-25:41
One is abandonment.
25:42-25:47
I don't have time to get into all this today, but just jot down 1 Corinthians 7:15.
25:48-26:03
Abandonment, when you have a spouse who just walks out of the marriage, I'm not willing to counsel, I'm not willing to reconcile, I'm not willing to consider anything, I'm leaving you, I don't care, I am done, abandonment.
26:03-26:08
My best understanding from scripture is that is biblical grounds for divorce.
26:09-26:20
When you've tried, but your partner is completely unwilling, that gives evidence that their heart is so hard, they're not willing at all to invest in the covenant.
26:21-26:22
Abandonment.
26:24-26:31
And the other evidence of hard-heartedness in marriage, what Jesus references here, and that's adultery.
26:32-26:38
That's your heart is so hard towards your spouse that you were willing to physically sleep with somebody else.
26:42-26:43
It's evidence of a hard heart.
26:48-27:02
I want you to listen very closely because even these conditions, even these conditions, Even the issue of adultery does not obligate anyone to divorce.
27:06-27:12
Because you study God's Word, God's Word never condones divorce and it never commands divorce.
27:13-27:31
There is not one passage in your Bible where God says, "If this happens, I command my people to get a divorce." that it is legitimate, an abandonment and adultery, but it's still not commanded.
27:34-27:40
So if you're married, you should do everything that you can to avoid divorce.
27:44-27:52
See, the scribes and the Pharisees, they lived their marriages with one hand over the eject seat button.
27:53-27:56
It's like, I'm not happy with you for any reason.
27:56-27:57
I am done.
27:57-27:58
Jesus said, no, no, no, no, no.
27:58-28:00
That's not how it should be.
28:03-28:07
You should do everything you can to avoid divorce.
28:10-28:12
You're like, well, what about abuse?
28:13-28:16
What if I'm in a relationship where there's abuse?
28:18-28:19
That absolutely should not be happening.
28:21-28:28
And listen, if you're in an abusive situation, You need to let me know as soon as possible because we will protect you.
28:28-28:29
We will get you out of harm's way.
28:29-28:32
We will do everything to keep you from being abused.
28:33-28:34
That should not be happening.
28:38-28:40
Somebody else would say, "Well, what about neglect?
28:41-28:42
"What about detachment?
28:42-28:51
"What about my husband's a lazy bum?" Do not be too proud to get biblical counsel.
28:53-28:56
Because there's something else I've seen over the last two and a half decades or so.
28:57-28:59
No marriage is beyond saving.
29:01-29:18
I've seen marriages, I've seen couples come in hours away from filing for divorce, whose marriage ended up in a better place than it ever has been through the result of the ministry of the Word of God.
29:20-29:26
If both parties are willing, the marriage can be saved.
29:29-29:41
And when we talk about, yes, abuse and neglect and things like that, we have to readily admit that there are extreme cases that require extreme action, 100%.
29:42-29:50
But in our day, like in Jesus' day, The vast majority of divorces weren't because of that.
29:52-29:58
The vast majority of divorces were motivated by sinful, selfish desires.
29:59-30:05
The vast majority of divorces result from people treating people like used cars.
30:07-30:09
Like, "Oh, this one isn't working out for me.
30:09-30:12
"I thought I would like it, "but I'm not really digging it anymore.
30:13-30:17
"I'm just gonna trade it in." That's most divorces.
30:20-30:40
And Jesus says, "No, you've reduced the marriage covenant, "you've trivialized it, you've made it purely external, "and now as a result, all kinds of adultery is happening "because you're unwilling to take marriage seriously." That should not be among God's people.
30:44-30:46
You know, it's a hard passage.
30:47-30:56
What I want us to do, just so I don't want anybody to think that this is some oddball passage.
30:58-30:59
This is a one-off.
30:59-31:01
Because I want you to turn to Mark chapter 10.
31:02-31:11
Because what I want you to see here is Jesus teaching the exact same thing, but in a different context.
31:12-31:15
In Mark 10, the context you'll see, they were testing Jesus.
31:17-31:18
They were trying to trap Jesus.
31:18-31:19
They were always trying to trap Jesus.
31:20-31:22
And they thought, "Oh, we know how to trap Jesus.
31:22-31:24
We'll ask him about marriage and divorce.
31:24-31:25
That'll get him for sure." Why?
31:26-31:28
Well, you know the story of John the Baptist.
31:29-31:35
He objected to a marriage and divorce and he lost his head.
31:36-31:39
And I go, "We get Jesus on that, they'll get him for sure.
31:40-31:48
We'll trap him." Now we have context, but I want you to see Jesus teaching the exact same thing, but in a different context.
31:48-32:13
Mark 10, verse two, the Pharisees came up and in order to test him, asked, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?" They're like, "We got him, we got him, slam dunk." Because see, if Jesus says no, we're like, Oh, you disagree with the Old Testament, which tells us to get a divorce.
32:15-32:17
If Jesus says, no, you shouldn't get a divorce, rather.
32:18-32:19
You're disagreeing with the Old Testament.
32:19-32:22
But if Jesus says, oh yeah, you can get a divorce.
32:22-32:25
Oh, now Jesus is taking marriage lightly.
32:25-32:26
And we're gonna get him either way.
32:28-32:33
You know, Jesus is disregarding the seriousness of marriage or he's disregarding what the Old Testament says about divorce.
32:33-32:33
We got him.
32:34-32:34
We got him.
32:35-32:37
Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?
32:39-32:40
I love this.
32:40-32:52
Jesus answered them, "What did Moses command you?" Jesus is like, "What's the Bible say?" Turned it back on them.
32:53-32:59
They said, look at this, "Moses allowed a man to write a certificate of divorce "and to send her away." Do you see?
32:59-33:01
It's about the stinking paperwork again.
33:03-33:05
That's all they were fixated on.
33:05-33:30
"Moses said, fill out form A-27 and you're good." Jesus said to them, "Because of your hardness of heart," there it is, "Because of your hardness of heart, He wrote you this commandment, that from the beginning of creation, God made them male and female.
33:30-33:38
Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother "and hold fast to his wife, "and the two shall become one flesh." Sound familiar?
33:38-33:39
Genesis 2.24.
33:41-33:43
Then Jesus comments on it.
33:43-33:46
He says, "So they're no longer two, but one flesh.
33:46-34:00
"What therefore God has joined together, "let not man separate." Verse 10 says, "And in the house, "the disciples asked him again." It was controversial, wasn't it?
34:00-34:03
The disciples asked him again about this matter.
34:03-34:11
And he said to them, whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her.
34:11-34:16
And if she divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery.
34:16-34:17
You see, it's the same teaching.
34:20-34:25
Same two points in this exchange that we see in Matthew chapter five.
34:27-34:29
Jesus says you've trivialized marriage.
34:32-34:34
And it just causes more adultery.
34:37-34:47
God takes marriage very seriously, especially to those who claim to be followers of Jesus Christ.
34:48-34:50
Why is God so...
34:53-34:56
Why does God seem so strict about marriage?
34:56-34:58
Why does God seem so serious about marriage?
35:01-35:07
It's because divorce ultimately misrepresents God.
35:12-35:24
See, God takes marriage seriously because there's a picture that's to be on display in the marriage.
35:26-35:30
But when that picture is broken, God is misrepresented.
35:31-35:34
Ephesians chapter five tells us what the picture is.
35:36-35:49
It says, "Now as the church submits to Christ, "so also wives should submit in everything "to their husbands." Husbands, love your wives as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.
35:49-35:53
See, this is the idea behind marriage.
35:53-35:58
The ultimate goal of marriage is the ultimate goal of everything else in the universe, is to glorify God.
36:00-36:11
And the way God is glorified in your marriage is by demonstrating the relationship that Jesus Christ has with his bride, the church.
36:12-36:25
And in this picture, the wife represents the church, following, submitting, honoring, and the husband is to represent Jesus, loving, leading, laying his life down.
36:27-36:35
And when you live this out, God is glorified and your marriage is blessed.
36:37-36:42
But when you divorce, you're misrepresenting God.
36:44-36:52
So my friends, what are we showing the world about God in the way we conduct ourselves?
36:53-36:55
in our marriages.
36:57-37:00
Our worship team and communion servers would come up.
37:02-37:10
It's only appropriate that we close by gathering around the Lord's table.
37:13-37:17
Like, well, what does this have to do with marriage?
37:19-37:20
The answer is everything.
37:23-37:31
Because we gather around the Lord's table, we are reminded that Jesus Christ has a covenant love for us.
37:33-37:36
This love that Jesus Christ has for us is forever.
37:38-37:39
It's never going to change.
37:42-37:48
And even when his bride fails him, and we do.
37:49-37:50
Oh, and we will.
37:52-37:54
Jesus isn't gonna give up on us.
37:57-38:03
This is our reminder of what covenant love looks like.
38:04-38:11
And this is a reminder of how covenant love is to be demonstrated in our marriages.

Small Group Discussion
Read Matthew 5:31-32 & Mark 10:2-12

What was your big take-away from this passage / message?
What are some beliefs you’ve heard Christians believe about divorce and remarriage? How do these line up with Scripture?
Explain what Jesus meant in Matt 5:32, how someone’s divorce even leads to other people committing adultery.
How exactly would you counsel a trusted Christian friend who is considering divorce?

Breakout
Pray for one another.

Jeff Miller

May 11, 2025

The Heart of the Law

Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery

Jeff Miller

May 11, 2025

The Heart of the Law

Introduction:

2 Kings 18:4 – He removed the high places and broke the pillars and cut down the Asherah. And he broke in pieces the bronze serpent that Moses had made, for until those days the people of Israel had made offerings to it (it was called Nehushtan).

Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery (Matthew 5:27-30):

Adultery Is a DEVASTATING SIN. (Matt 5:27–28)

Matthew 15:19 – For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false witness, slander.

Titus 1:15 – To the pure, all things are pure, but to the defiled and unbelieving, nothing is pure; but both their minds and their consciences are defiled.
Adultery has DIRE CONSEQUNECES. (Matt 5:29–30)

1 Corinthians 6:9–10 – Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God.
Adultery requires DRASTIC MEASURES. (Matt 5:29–30)

Romans 13:14 - But put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no provision for the flesh, to gratify its desires.

1 Corinthians 6:9–11 – And such were some of you. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.

Sermon Notes (PDF): BLANK
Hint: Highlight blanks above for answers!

00:00-00:04
Open up those Bibles to Matthew chapter 5.
00:07-00:14
If you're visiting with us today, we are going through the Sermon on the Mount verse by verse.
00:19-00:21
And happy Mother's Day.
00:23-00:42
The title of today's sermon is "Thou Shall Not Commit Adultery." We go where the text goes, okay?
00:44-00:44
That's what we do.
00:46-00:48
We go where the text goes.
00:49-00:50
So let's do that.
00:50-00:56
I'd like you to bow your heads please and just pray for me to be faithful to communicate God's Word.
00:57-01:09
And I will pray for you to have a heart open to receive what is an extremely challenging passage.
01:09-01:10
Let's pray.
01:17-01:21
Father in heaven, we thank you for your Word.
01:23-01:25
We're not going to shy away from it.
01:26-01:33
We just heard two testimonies of the way that your Word has transformed lives.
01:34-01:37
We're going to hear at least four more in the next service.
01:40-01:47
That's why we just want to go after your Word, God, because we believe that your word does your work, because that's what you said.
01:49-01:51
And that is certainly what we've seen.
01:52-02:01
So Father, I pray for all of us here today, all those who are gonna be listening, watching the stream or downloading the podcast.
02:02-02:11
Father, I pray that you would bring revival in each and every heart in a way that greatly glorifies your name.
02:12-02:14
We pray in Jesus' name.
02:14-02:18
And all of God's people said, Amen.
02:18-02:18
Amen.
02:19-02:20
Matthew chapter five, are you there?
02:21-02:31
In Numbers chapter 21, you have Moses leading the Israelites out of Egypt to the promised land.
02:32-02:37
And Israel complained and grumbled against God, against Moses.
02:37-02:45
And the Lord sent these fiery serpents who, And these serpents bit some of the Israelites and many of them died.
02:47-02:48
Well, they repented.
02:49-02:57
And God told Moses to put a bronze serpent on a pole.
02:58-03:06
And if the Israelites, when they were bitten by one of the snakes, if they looked at this bronze serpent, they would live.
03:08-03:19
Well then fast forward, Israel in the land established and they had kings, some kings were very bad and some kings were just not as bad.
03:20-03:22
All right, can you relate to that at all?
03:25-03:32
And Hezekiah was a king who was not as bad and he brought a lot of reforms to Israel.
03:34-03:37
Here's one, we put this verse up from 2 Kings 18.
03:38-03:45
Hezekiah says, "He removed the high places and broke the pillars and cut down the Asherah.
03:45-03:50
And he broke in pieces the bronze serpent that Moses had made.
03:51-03:55
For until those days, the people of Israel had made offerings to it.
03:57-04:02
It was called Nahushtin." See what happened?
04:03-04:04
You see what happened?
04:04-04:17
people took a blessing that God gave them for their benefit, and they turned it into an idol.
04:21-04:26
And that's exactly how it is with physical intimacy.
04:29-04:43
It is a gift that God gave to people those in the covenant of marriage, but we have turned it into an idol.
04:45-04:51
So in your outline today, this is it.
04:52-04:55
Thou shall not commit adultery.
04:58-05:00
I want you to write some things down.
05:02-05:05
Number one, write this down.
05:05-05:07
Adultery is a devastating sin.
05:10-05:12
Adultery is a devastating sin.
05:16-05:18
Now just that statement alone, it's a hard sell.
05:20-05:24
Because we are a sex-obsessed culture.
05:25-05:30
We've taken this gift from God, and we've perverted it, and we worship it.
05:32-05:36
I mean, do I have to point that out at all?
05:37-05:43
Like, look at all the homosexuality madness, all the transgender stuff.
05:46-05:48
And you're like, "Yeah, you know what, Pastor Jeff?
05:48-05:48
You're right.
05:48-05:49
You're right.
05:50-06:03
It's bad out there." And I would say, "Church, it's bad in here." I was reading some polls for what they're worth.
06:04-06:10
But according to one poll, one half of self-identifying Christians believe that casual sex is okay.
06:13-06:15
Consenting, but not in a relationship.
06:15-06:16
They believe that's okay.
06:16-06:19
Half think that's all right.
06:20-06:20
What?
06:23-06:25
I read a poll about pornography use.
06:26-06:30
Among non-Christian men, 65%.
06:33-06:35
Like, yeah, that's pretty bad.
06:36-06:39
Christian men, 64%.
06:45-06:49
In the same poll, lest you think, yeah, creepy men, right?
06:50-06:53
Creepy men, same poll, 51% of women.
06:56-07:02
And you know, at this point, you could be like, well, look, look, Jeff, we're only human.
07:02-07:03
Everyone does it.
07:04-07:05
It's not hurting anyone.
07:09-07:14
Well, according to Jesus, it's a devastating sin.
07:15-07:17
Look at verse 27, Matthew 5.
07:18-07:25
Jesus said, "You have heard that it was said, "You shall not commit adultery." Stop there.
07:26-07:28
Adultery, what is adultery?
07:29-07:34
Well, the technical term is defined as intercourse with another person's spouse.
07:36-07:42
But it's become a catch-all term for relations with anyone who is not your spouse.
07:42-07:49
And you're going to see in this passage, it's very clear that that's how Jesus was using the term in the most general sense possible.
07:51-07:55
You go to Exodus 20 in verse 14, you see that it's the seventh commandments.
07:56-08:05
You go to Deuteronomy 22 in verse 22, you'll see that under the law in Israel, adultery was punishable by death.
08:07-08:09
And I don't have time to get into it this morning.
08:10-08:12
We've done a whole sermon series on this by the way.
08:13-08:23
But I just encourage you, if you're ready to just brush it off as all church people just making a big deal out of nothing, Read Proverbs 5, 6, and 7 sometime.
08:24-08:28
And you will see that adultery is a devastating sin.
08:31-08:34
I heard one pastor this past week call it a sin for fools.
08:35-08:37
And I think that's a very good description.
08:39-08:42
Adultery, it's devastating.
08:43-08:49
I mean, it wrecks you, destroys your reputation.
08:50-08:54
It affects your relationship with your spouse, relationship with your kids.
08:55-08:57
Oh, and the other person, what about them?
08:57-08:58
It affects...
08:58-09:01
Now, if they're married, it affects their relationship with their spouse.
09:01-09:06
If they have kids, it affects their kids and what it's done to their reputation.
09:06-09:13
But the devastation of adultery is way deeper than that.
09:14-09:15
Look at verse 28.
09:16-09:40
Jesus says, "But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart." Do you notice verse 27, verse 28, Jesus said, "You have heard, but I say to you." What was Jesus doing?
09:40-09:42
Pastor Taylor talked about this last week.
09:42-09:43
Same thing with murder.
09:44-09:45
Same thing.
09:45-09:52
Jesus was contrasting their definition of sin with God's definition of sin.
09:53-09:57
Because their definition of sin in Jesus' day was all about externals.
09:58-10:05
So when they hear adultery, they're thinking only in terms of the physical act with another person, that's it.
10:05-10:07
That alone is adultery.
10:08-10:16
And Jesus says, "No, you're not." You're not taking it far enough in your understanding.
10:16-10:20
It's a heart issue, like murder.
10:21-10:25
You don't have to actually kill someone to be considered a murderer in the eyes of God.
10:25-10:27
Jesus is saying the same thing about adultery.
10:27-10:34
You don't have to physically be with another person to be an adulterer.
10:40-10:41
Look at verse 28 again.
10:42-11:11
He says, "I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart." Now you have to understand this looking with lustful intent, It's not an accidental glance.
11:12-11:13
Okay?
11:14-11:21
This is literally in the process of continuing to look.
11:23-11:30
It's looking in such a way that you are fueling your sexual imagination.
11:35-11:38
And when that happens, the deed's already done.
11:40-11:42
Adultery has happened.
11:44-11:51
Now, listen, I don't want you to misunderstand, because it's even worse than you think it is.
11:52-12:07
Listen, Jesus did not say, Jesus did not say that looking at a woman with lustful intent causes you to commit adultery in your hearts.
12:11-12:19
Jesus said looking at a woman with lustful intent means you already committed adultery in your heart.
12:24-12:35
Jesus is saying that you looked with lustful intent because it was already in your heart to commit adultery.
12:40-12:42
See, I think this is where a lot of people get this mixed up.
12:43-13:03
It's not, "Oh, I was going about my business "and I just stumbled across this woman "and I looked at her and that is what caused me to lust." That's not the extent of it.
13:04-13:08
It's this, I have an adulterous heart that's looking for a woman to lust over.
13:10-13:10
See the difference?
13:11-13:15
The look did not cause the lust.
13:17-13:21
It is the lust that caused the look.
13:22-13:23
Do you see the difference?
13:25-13:30
Look, look, I can't, there's no way I can overstate this.
13:31-13:33
that this is a real problem.
13:34-13:40
And this is a real problem that people sitting here have right now and are not dealing with it.
13:42-13:46
You're not an adulterer because of something you do, it's who you are.
13:46-13:47
It's a hard thing.
13:49-14:26
You see with adultery, like murder, as Pastor Taylor talked about last week, before it's an act, even if it doesn't become an act, act. That is what is in your hearts. This is the heart of the law. Jesus said in Matthew 15, 19, "For out of the heart, out of the heart come evil thoughts, murder, adultery, Sexual immorality, theft, false witness, slander.
14:26-14:27
You see that?
14:28-14:33
The sinful acts are symptoms of a sinful condition.
14:33-14:39
Committing the act of adultery, those are the leaves on the tree that has the root of an adulterous heart.
14:42-14:52
And if you're sitting here still somehow magnanimously saying in your head, "I would never commit the act.
14:53-14:56
I did not and I would never commit the act of adultery.
14:59-15:08
But if that sin is in your mind, if that sin is constantly in your imagination, you have a real problem.
15:11-15:14
That's why pornography is such a big business.
15:14-15:14
Why?
15:15-15:19
Because sinful hearts are literally searching for it.
15:22-15:33
And you have to understand that if that's your issue, the sin started even before you got online, because it's in here.
15:38-15:41
It's a devastating condition to live in.
15:44-15:54
You're unable to live a holy and upright life because when your heart is full of adultery, It just, it perverts everything.
15:57-15:58
Like consider Titus 1:15.
15:59-16:00
Look at this verse.
16:02-16:23
Paul says, "To the pure, all things are pure, "but to the defiled and unbelieving," meaning your heart is full of perversion and sin, "to the defiled and unbelieving, nothing is pure, but both their minds and their consciences are defiled.
16:24-16:25
Do you know what that means?
16:26-16:36
That means that when you're in that latter condition, you cannot look at another woman purely.
16:38-16:44
You cannot see another woman as a sister, as a mom, as even just another human being.
16:47-16:52
That when this is where your heart is, every woman that you encounter, you're evaluating.
16:55-17:04
And many become objects in your minds and hearts of fantasies, and lust just becomes all-consuming.
17:09-17:15
And the people that live in this defiled state don't even see a problem.
17:18-17:25
gift of marital intimacy has become an idol that you use to gratify your flesh.
17:26-17:31
So see, Jesus is telling us out the gate, this is a devastating condition.
17:33-17:44
Secondly, thou shalt not commit adultery. Not only is adultery a devastating sin, but adultery has dire consequences. Adultery has dire consequences.
17:47-18:50
Look at verses 29 and 30. These two verses kind of saying the same thing, but this is some of the most startling stuff Jesus ever said, in my opinion. He says, "If your right eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body be thrown into hell. And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away, for it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body go into hell." And you're like, "Man, gouge out your eye? Like cut off your hand? Like If that's the part you're focusing on, then you have completely missed the point.
18:53-18:55
Because neither of those things are extreme.
18:57-19:01
They're not extreme at all compared to hell.
19:03-19:07
Notice twice Jesus says, "Thrown into hell." Thrown into hell.
19:07-19:09
What's the obvious implication?
19:09-19:10
We get it.
19:11-19:12
We get what he's saying.
19:12-19:17
Jesus is saying here that people with adulterous hearts go to hell.
19:22-19:25
If you're still not convinced, Paul backs this up.
19:25-19:28
1 Corinthians 6, verses nine through 10.
19:28-19:38
He says, "Or do you not know that the unrighteous "will not inherit the kingdom of God?" Meaning go to heaven, meaning go to hell.
19:40-19:43
He says, "Do not be deceived.
19:43-20:05
Neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God." Your priority in this life, more than anything, should be preparing yourself for eternity.
20:11-20:12
Are you doing that?
20:15-20:17
Because the Bible says your decisions in this life matter.
20:19-20:21
And someday you're going to stand before God.
20:22-20:31
So if lust is a problem for you, if lust characterizes you, and look, I can't answer that.
20:35-20:43
I can't answer that for you, but you know if this sin consumes who you are.
20:44-20:47
And if it characterizes you, there are consequences.
20:49-20:56
As we talked about before, here and now, apparently, obviously, easily seen, there are consequences for adultery.
20:57-21:02
But Jesus says there's also consequences when you take your last breath.
21:05-21:06
Adultery has dire consequences.
21:12-21:15
So let's talk about the other big thing in these verses.
21:15-21:20
Number three, adultery requires drastic measures.
21:23-21:24
Look at them again.
21:25-21:29
He says, "If your right eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away.
21:30-21:34
For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body be thrown into hell.
21:34-21:39
And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away.
21:39-21:44
For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body go into hell.
21:46-21:51
Weren't you just blessed by the obedience of those who were baptized today?
21:52-21:54
Wouldn't you say obedience is a wonderful thing?
21:57-21:58
Awesome.
22:00-22:00
Who's first?
22:04-22:08
I mean, didn't Jesus just say, if your hand causes you to sin, to cut it off?
22:09-22:10
Who's first?
22:11-22:14
We're not gonna do it over the tub 'cause we get more baptisms in the next service.
22:19-22:21
And you're like, yeah, what about the other verse?
22:21-22:22
Oh, don't worry.
22:25-22:26
We can take care of the eye too.
22:29-22:30
We'll get Pastor Taylor up here.
22:30-22:31
We'll do them both at the same time.
22:34-22:35
You won't know.
22:37-22:40
You won't even know what's going on when both of them are happening at the same time.
22:43-22:51
And you're like, man, gouging out your eye and cutting off your hand.
22:54-22:57
Man, that sounds drastic.
23:00-23:02
Oh, it absolutely is.
23:04-23:06
Maybe even more than you think.
23:06-23:14
Because you see, Jesus was speaking to Jews, and the Jews viewed the right greater than the left.
23:15-23:20
Just as a general thing, if you're left-handed, I don't need any hate emails, okay?
23:22-23:24
That's just the way it was, right?
23:24-23:26
Sitting at the right hand, my right hand man.
23:27-23:29
The idea was right is better than left.
23:31-23:41
So your right eye and your right hand and the Jewish mindset, those were the two most important things that you own.
23:43-23:58
What Jesus is saying is this, there is nothing that is too important to eliminate from your life if it is causing you to sin.
24:02-24:04
Adultery is destructive.
24:05-24:06
It's enslaving.
24:06-24:08
It's condemning.
24:11-24:13
We gotta deal with that.
24:14-24:16
We have to deal with it.
24:16-24:16
Do you believe that?
24:20-24:21
Whatever.
24:24-24:37
Listen, whatever it is that feeds the lust in your heart, no matter how important that thing is, it has got to go.
24:40-24:41
It's gotta go.
24:47-25:18
If you're feeding your lust through your phone or maybe a tablet, smash them up. And you're like, "But Pastor Jeff, I have the newest iPhone, you know, I spent a lot of money for that." It's not worth hell. Is it your laptop? Smash it up.
25:22-25:28
Or take your laptop to the kitchen and only use it around your family.
25:30-25:33
You're like, "Oh, Pastor Jeff, my family's really nebby." Good.
25:35-25:36
So glad to hear that.
25:38-25:39
It's not worth hell.
25:44-25:56
Maybe for some of you, it's your social media accounts where you're having inappropriate relationships, conversations with people online, or looking at things through those that you shouldn't be looking at.
25:57-25:58
Delete them.
25:59-26:01
Delete those social media accounts.
26:02-26:07
You're like, "But Pastor Jeff, that's how I stay connected." Join a small group.
26:11-26:17
You're like, "But Pastor Jeff, the social media, that's just my leisure time." Take up pickleball.
26:19-26:20
It's not worth hell.
26:25-26:27
You know what, maybe we'll just take care of all this.
26:27-26:31
Call and cancel your internet, if it's a problem.
26:32-26:38
If it's leading you to feed this lust, Jesus says it has to go!
26:38-26:44
And you're like, "But Pastor Jeff, I need the internet for my job." Get a new job.
26:45-27:08
I will find you a job where you don't need the Internet because it's not worth hell. Maybe for some of you as we are approaching summer, maybe it's a membership in a public pool. Like, you know what, I go there Pastor Jim and I look at the women there and I gotta tell you, what did Jesus say?
27:11-27:13
You've got to get extreme here, people.
27:18-27:25
Like, "But Pastor Jeff, my pool membership, that's just kind of our thing, like we do in the summer." Swim at home.
27:27-27:31
Like, "But I don't have a pool at my house." Do you have a bathtub?
27:37-27:38
It's not worth hell.
27:40-27:45
And I know people are like, "Okay, Pastor Jeff, I hear what you're saying, "but I'm gonna be honest with you.
27:47-27:53
"It's gonna be kind of embarrassing "to have to explain to people "why I smashed my phone and canceled my internet.
27:54-27:56
"I'm gonna have to explain to people why I did that.
27:57-28:22
"That's kind of embarrassing." I'll tell you what's gonna be more embarrassing than that is you not cutting off your sin, And someday you're gonna stand before God and God's going to say, "Do you remember the strangest Mother's Day sermon you've ever heard?" Why didn't you listen?
28:23-28:25
Why did you despise my word?
28:27-28:33
Why did you think following me was not worth cutting off the stuff that keeps you from following me with your whole heart?
28:34-28:35
Why did you find me not worthy?
28:40-28:49
Notice Jesus says, "It's better, it is better to lose your eye, lose your hand.
28:50-28:54
It's better." What's better than going to hell?
28:57-28:59
Literally anything.
29:02-29:08
Everything you have to lose for the sake of your soul is going to be worth it.
29:12-29:14
Romans 13-14.
29:16-29:16
Same thing.
29:17-29:18
Paul's saying the same thing.
29:19-29:23
Maybe not in as graphic terms as Jesus, but it's the same thing.
29:23-29:31
He says, "But put on the Lord Jesus Christ and make no provision for the flesh to gratify its desires.
29:33-29:34
Make no provision.
29:36-29:43
Take drastic measures to cut off anything that feeds the flesh.
29:46-29:48
It's like that old story I heard.
29:50-29:51
An old metaphor.
29:53-29:58
Maybe you've heard about the guy, He had a white dog and a gray dog.
30:00-30:07
And every time he put food out for them, the gray dog would whoop up the white dog, take all the food.
30:09-30:10
The white dog would get none.
30:12-30:17
After a while, the white dog not eating got weaker and weaker and weaker.
30:17-30:20
And the gray dog getting all the food got stronger and stronger and stronger.
30:21-30:38
guy said, "I gotta do something about this." So he put both the dogs on a leash, and for a month he only fed the white dog.
30:41-31:11
This isn't a real story, by the way. Don't call PETA. All right? But he only fed the white dog, the gray dog barely surviving. But after that time of only feeding the white dog and not the gray dog when he let them off the leash, now the white dog was strong because it was the one that got fed. And the gray dog was weak because it was the one that got starved.
31:13-31:18
And I think you see the obvious application.
31:21-31:24
The dog you feed is going to be the dominant dog.
31:27-31:30
And the dog you starve is going to be the weak dog.
31:32-31:36
See in this analogy, the white dog represents walking by the Spirit.
31:38-31:40
The gray dog represents walking in the flesh.
31:46-31:53
I think some of you are so weak because you're not feeding the Spirit, so to speak.
31:55-31:57
You're not into word.
31:57-31:58
You're not worshiping.
32:00-32:00
You're not praying.
32:02-32:03
You're not in fellowship.
32:05-32:08
You're not listening to good biblical podcasts.
32:11-32:12
You're starving that.
32:15-32:17
When instead you need to be starving the flesh.
32:18-32:21
Make no provision for the flesh.
32:22-32:26
Starve the adulterous heart by making no provision for it.
32:27-32:33
Whichever dog you feed is going to be the dog that is strong.
32:34-32:38
The dog that you don't feed is the dog that gets weak.
32:41-32:48
And you're like, man, Pastor Jeff, this sounds impossible.
32:52-32:54
Oh, it is, absolutely.
32:55-32:58
That's why, can we put Romans 13 back up there, please?
32:58-32:59
It is impossible.
33:00-33:14
Hence, the first phrase in this verse, "Put on the Lord Jesus Christ." See, reformation is not going to work.
33:17-33:25
If your goal here is to just try to clean up your act, you're not going to get very far.
33:26-33:27
You need transformation.
33:29-33:35
You need the life of Christ in us to be able to make these choices.
33:37-33:44
Oh, and by the way, earlier we read, well, 1 Corinthians 6, we read verses nine and 10.
33:45-33:49
I'd like to go back and I'd like to look at the very next verse.
33:50-33:53
Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God?
33:54-34:30
Do not be deceived, neither the sexually immoral nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God." But look at verse 11, "And such were some of you, that you were washed, you were sanctified, You were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ, by the Spirit of our God.
34:33-34:43
I just want to ask you today, are you an "are" or are you a "were"?
34:44-34:52
Because today, today could be the most important day of your life, because today you can become I'm a worm.
34:54-34:56
I'd like you to bow your heads as the worship team makes their way back up.
34:58-35:00
I'd just like you to bow your heads.
35:02-35:03
And close your eyes.
35:04-35:06
Look, this is a between you and God thing here, alright?
35:13-35:17
There are some of you that have been trapped because you don't know Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior.
35:18-35:26
You don't have the power or resources this sin because you're living in the flesh, not by the power of His Holy Spirit, because you don't know.
35:30-35:35
Today can be the day that you receive Him.
35:35-35:36
And you know what?
35:36-35:37
We're baptizing in the next service.
35:38-35:46
Pastor Taylor would be thrilled to be able to baptize you because you've repented from your sin and turned to Jesus Christ.
35:52-36:52
But if you, heads bowed, eyes closed, if you're sitting here and you're like, "You know what, Pastor, I am a believer in Jesus Christ, but I'm honestly, I'm stuck in this sin." I just want to ask you, Christian stuck in this sin, why in the world would you indulge sin that Jesus died for. Today, Christian, you need to repent. Today, Christian, you need to do some cutting. Father in heaven, I just simply ask today that you open up the eyes of our hearts that we don't look at this sin from a worldly perspective because the world celebrates it. Father, let us see this sin from your perspective. It's a horrible sin.
36:56-37:43
Father, let us see the consequences that Jesus laid out for us. There is eternal separation from you for the heart that chooses to live in lust instead of walking by the Spirit. Father, I pray that you would give us the wisdom, you would give us the strength, and you would give us the faith to be able to cut some things today. It's ultimately going to bless us to be free from this bondage, but the end goal of all things, Father, is for the glory of your name.
37:44-37:59
So, Father, I pray that you would glorify your name through a work of your Holy Spirit, bringing people to you in repentance and bringing your people back from a willing bondage to sin.
38:01-38:03
We praise you, Father.
38:04-38:08
Let our life, our very life be an act of worship.
38:11-38:15
In the way we repent, we pray in Jesus' name, Amen.

Small Group Discussion
Read Matthew 5:27-30

What was your big take-away from this passage / message?
Explain Matthew 5:28 in your own words.
What did Jesus mean by gouging out your right eye and cutting off your right hand (Matt 5:29-30)? What are some practical ways to apply this teaching?
Is Jesus saying a believer who commits adultery will go to hell? Who exactly is “thrown into hell”?
What would you say to a professing believer who confesses that they can’t break free from lusting?

Breakout
Pray for one another.

Jeff Miller

May 10, 2020

Knowing Jesus

Knowing Jesus - Knowing His Grace

Jeff Miller

May 10, 2020

Knowing Jesus

Introduction:

We All Need Grace (John 8:1-11):

But we don't often Give it. (John 8:3-5)
Leviticus 20:10 - If a man commits adultery with the wife of his neighbor, both the adulterer and the adulteress shall surely be put to death.

  
    Am I a gracious person?
  
  Deep down, am I still angry with someone who wronged me, ever after they apologize?
Are there broken relationships in my life that I refuse to heal?
Do I believe certain people don't deserve forgiveness?
When someone messes up, do I prefer to criticizing their mistakes over praying for them to get to a better place?

But we don't often Recognize our need for it. (John 8:6-9)
But we don't often Understand it. (John 8:10-11)

Sermon Notes (PDF): BLANK
Hint: Highlight blanks above for answers!

00:00-00:06
Welcome everyone to Harvest Bible Chapel as we prepare to worship the Lord and to get into His Word together.
00:07-00:16
And today, on behalf of the leadership of Harvest Bible Chapel, we would like to give a special shout out to all of our mothers, or mother figures, that are part of our church.
00:17-00:18
Happy Mother's Day.
00:20-00:25
Open your Bibles with me please to the Gospel of John 8.
00:26-00:29
Actually, we'll be starting at the end of chapter 7.
00:32-00:44
While you're turning there, I read this week back in 2016, a man in Australia spotted a large tour bus.
00:45-00:48
And he knew that these buses had very large gas tanks.
00:50-00:56
And what he wanted to do was to siphon the gas out of the tour bus.
00:57-01:05
And if you don't know what siphoning gas is, I can't recommend strongly enough that you never ever do it.
01:05-01:14
But it's taking a hose, putting the hose into a gas tank, and sucking the hose and having the gas come out.
01:14-01:17
It's a way of stealing gas out from people.
01:17-01:21
and it's extremely dangerous and it's extremely stupid.
01:23-01:24
It's extremely mean.
01:25-01:42
Well, this man saw this tour bus and thought, "Well, I can steal a lot of gas from the bus." Well, little did he know that he inserted the hose into the sewage tank instead.
01:45-01:58
So when he placed the hose in his mouth, and inhaled deeply, he got a mouthful of...
01:58-02:00
you can probably guess.
02:01-02:08
Well, the police were called, but the owners of the bus decided that they did not want their property back.
02:10-02:11
What do we call that?
02:13-02:15
We call that karma, don't we?
02:16-02:19
Actually, specifically, we call this instant karma.
02:20-02:25
It's this belief that ultimately, eventually, you get what you deserve.
02:25-02:36
And I'm not sure I believe in karma, but I do believe in the opposite of karma, and that's what we're talking about today.
02:38-02:39
We're talking about grace.
02:41-02:43
Karma is getting what you deserve.
02:46-02:48
Grace is getting what you don't deserve.
02:51-02:58
The best way I have ever heard grace defined is with this little story, this little analogy.
03:00-03:04
Imagine that you have a 16-year-old son.
03:05-03:07
And your 16-year-old son goes to a party.
03:09-03:14
at this party, another 16-year-old boy, for whatever reason, gets angry at your son.
03:16-03:19
And this other 16-year-old boy murders your son.
03:21-03:28
Now if you track that boy down and murder him yourself, that's called vengeance.
03:31-03:41
But if you track that boy down and you get him arrested and he goes to court and he's prosecuted and he goes to jail, that's called justice.
03:43-03:53
But if you track that boy down and he's arrested and he ends up in court, and somehow you convince the judge to let him go.
03:55-03:57
No punishment, just let him go.
03:57-04:00
That is called mercy.
04:04-04:22
But if you track that boy down and the rest of the ends up in court, and you somehow convince the judge that you want to take that boy into your home, and you want to raise him as your own son, and love him and care for him, that's called grace.
04:25-04:27
Grace is the very essence of knowing Jesus.
04:29-04:35
But unfortunately, many people just do not We know grace.
04:38-04:49
We learned some very surprising things about grace today as we walked through a very familiar and for a lot of people, a favorite passage of God's Word.
04:49-04:53
So if you're taking note of the heading on this outline, it's simply this.
04:54-04:54
We all need grace.
04:56-04:56
We all need grace.
04:57-05:05
And that's something I think we can all readily admit, But, here are the surprising truths that we're going to see in the text.
05:05-05:11
Number one, we all need grace, but we don't often give it.
05:12-05:15
We all need grace, but we don't often give it.
05:17-05:19
Look at 7:53.
05:20-05:24
It says, "They went each to his own house.
05:25-05:27
But Jesus went to the Mount of Olives.
05:28-05:30
early in the morning, he came again to the temple.
05:31-05:34
All the people came to him, and he sat down and taught them.
05:34-05:59
The scribes and the Pharisees brought a woman who had been caught in adultery, and placing her in the midst, they said to him, 'Teacher, this woman has been caught in the act of adultery.' "So in the law, Moses commanded us to stone such a woman." So what do you say?
06:01-06:02
Let's stop there.
06:03-06:06
And I would say, hang on, let's back up for a second.
06:09-06:12
Something pretty obviously strange about this story, right?
06:14-06:17
Where's the man who was caught in adultery?
06:18-06:25
It says that this woman was caught in the act, and it takes two to tango, right?
06:27-06:28
So where's the man?
06:28-06:30
Why did they only bring the woman?
06:32-06:36
Interestingly, she offers no defense throughout this passage.
06:37-06:43
So it seems that she was guilty, but there was somebody else guilty that was conveniently left out.
06:45-06:59
The scribes and the Pharisees bring this woman to Jesus, and they say, "Hey, she was caught committing adultery." And Moses said, "We need to stone her." That comes from Leviticus 20.
06:59-07:15
In verse 10, it says, "If a man commits adultery with the wife of his neighbor, both the adulterer and the adulteress shall surely be put to death." Now understand that stoning was the means of legal death penalty in the Old Testament.
07:16-07:19
Okay, that was like the electric chair or lethal injection.
07:21-07:35
But when we get to New Testament times, we see that stoning would sometimes be carried out by a mob, not through the courts, not through the authorities, not without due process, like Stephen in Acts 7.
07:38-07:46
Remember, it was illegal since Israel was under Roman occupation, it was illegal for Israel to execute criminals.
07:50-07:54
But regardless, honestly, all of this is irrelevant.
07:55-08:03
They weren't interested in the woman's fate as much as they were interested in trapping Jesus.
08:03-08:04
I mean, just think about it.
08:04-08:15
If this scenario was about justice, If they were really concerned about justice for this criminal woman, why didn't they take her to the appropriate authorities?
08:17-08:30
I mean, how often do you hear of an accused criminal being dragged before a civilian for the civilian's opinion about what should happen to the criminal?
08:31-08:47
I mean, do we ever hear that? Like somebody gets caught shoplifting, and we're going to arrest you, but before we take you to the police, we're gonna stop by and see Melanie the barber and see what she has to say about, like what?
08:48-08:51
They drag this criminal to Jesus.
08:51-08:52
Like, what do you think about this?
08:54-08:55
Well, look at verse six.
08:58-09:00
This they said to test him.
09:01-09:05
they might have some charge to bring against Him.
09:07-09:09
It was a trap. They wanted to discredit Jesus.
09:09-09:13
They wanted people to think that Jesus was a fraud.
09:14-09:24
Because if Jesus said, "No, no, no, no, don't stone her, don't stone her," well, then He's defying the law of Moses, and the people could say, "Oh, oh, oh, you don't believe in the law.
09:24-09:25
You don't agree with Moses.
09:25-09:29
You think you know better than the law that the Lord gave us.
09:31-09:41
But if Jesus said, "Yeah, you know what? Stone her. Execute her." Well, there's a problem there because you see Jesus loses His whole reputation.
09:42-09:48
Jesus had this reputation of being a friend of sinners, right?
09:48-09:51
Matthew 19.10, Luke 15.1.
09:52-09:53
He's a friend of sinners.
09:53-10:02
Jesus loves the tax collectors and the prostitutes, and Jesus cares for these people.
10:04-10:20
And if Jesus says, "Stone this woman," you see these scribes and Pharisees could say, "Well, that's awfully selective of you to want to kill her because you didn't want to stone the other sinners." They thought they had Him trapped.
10:22-10:24
What do you say, Jesus? What do you say?
10:27-10:38
And as much as I don't want to face this personally, you know, a lot of times I am more like these guys than I want to admit.
10:43-10:46
Everyone wants to think of themselves as a gracious person.
10:46-10:53
We all think of ourselves as, "Deep down I'm good, deep down I'm..." I'm very gracious.
10:55-10:55
Are you?
10:58-11:00
I'm going to give you a quick little test.
11:00-11:08
Just some yes or no questions to just sort of think through how gracious you are in your relationships to other people.
11:09-11:12
Specifically, as we're focusing on this passage.
11:12-11:13
Am I a gracious person?
11:16-11:17
Ask yourself.
11:18-11:18
Keep down.
11:20-11:24
Am I still angry with someone who wronged me even after they apologized?
11:26-11:27
Yes or no? Is that you?
11:28-11:29
What if I asked your wife?
11:30-11:31
What if I asked your husband?
11:35-11:40
Are there broken relationships in my life that I refuse to heal?
11:40-11:46
Even if they came crawling back to me, that person walked out of my life, I don't want them walking back in.
11:48-11:49
Is that true of you? Yes or no?
11:51-11:55
Do I believe certain people don't deserve forgiveness?
12:00-12:10
When someone messes up, do I prefer criticizing their mistakes over praying for them to get to a better place?
12:11-12:20
You see, if you're answering yes, Or even maybe, to any of these questions, then you probably aren't as gracious as you thought.
12:22-12:23
Here's the truth.
12:23-12:31
By default, because we are fallen people, born with a sinful nature, living in fallen flesh, by default, we are not gracious.
12:32-12:33
We just aren't.
12:34-12:45
And we need to start by acknowledging that as fallen people, Every single one of us have room to grow in grace.
12:45-12:46
We all need it.
12:48-12:49
But we don't often give it.
12:51-13:01
Secondly, we all need grace, but we don't often recognize our need for it.
13:02-13:04
Pick back up in verse 6.
13:06-13:19
and John points out that they said this to test him, that they might have some charge to bring against him, Jesus bent down and wrote with His finger on the ground.
13:20-13:27
Do you know this is the only passage in the New Testament that says that Jesus wrote, and we don't know what He wrote.
13:27-13:33
Wasn't there somebody there that was taking notes or could pull out a cell phone and take a picture of what Jesus was writing?
13:33-13:35
Everybody wants to know what Jesus wrote.
13:36-13:45
I read so many ideas and thoughts, and it really doesn't matter though.
13:45-13:52
Because if God wanted us to know what Jesus wrote, then He would have told us in His Word.
13:53-13:57
So you understand that it doesn't really matter what Jesus wrote.
13:58-14:07
What matters was Jesus stooping down to perform this action of writing on the ground.
14:08-14:09
Look at verse 7.
14:12-14:34
"And as they continued to ask Him, He stood up and said to them, "Let him who is without sin among you be the first to throw a stone at her." So Jesus, as He was writing in the ground, they just continued to badger Him.
14:34-14:35
Do you see that in the text?
14:36-14:37
Like, "What do you say, Jesus? Hey, what do you think?
14:37-14:39
What do you think we should do with this lady?
14:39-14:49
What do you say, Jesus?" And Jesus finally stood up, and He made one of the most famous statements in the Bible.
14:50-15:05
"Let him who is without sin among you be the first to throw a stone at her." Then, verse 8, "And once more he bent down and wrote on the ground." Back to writing.
15:08-15:13
I love this because this story started with them bringing a challenge to Jesus.
15:16-15:19
And Jesus turned the challenge to them.
15:20-15:29
Verse 9, "But when they heard it, they went away one by one, beginning with the older ones.
15:32-15:43
And Jesus was left alone with the woman standing before Him." They were convicted by their own conscience, and they suddenly became their own judge.
15:47-15:49
See, the Bible says that the older ones left first.
15:51-15:52
The older ones left first.
15:55-16:01
And I've got to tell you, I get that.
16:04-16:18
I've been in pastoral ministry now for 20 plus years, And I remember, as a much younger pastor, being so hard-nosed on things, holding the line on some things.
16:21-16:25
To go after people and say, "Hey, you violated the Scriptures!
16:26-16:27
What is the matter with you?
16:29-16:30
Don't you know the Bible?
16:30-16:39
I'm about to go full Leviticus on you." Then, you get a few miles on the car.
16:41-16:43
You take a few laps around the track, right?
16:45-16:52
And you mature in your understanding of your own failings.
16:56-17:06
And you minister to people who have struggled with bad choices, But they need somebody to pick them up, not kick them while they're down.
17:11-17:12
Come on church, we've all been there.
17:14-17:19
We hear that somebody is going through a divorce, and instantly we condemn.
17:20-17:23
Like divorce is evil, do you know what the Bible says about divorce?
17:23-17:24
And yes, yes.
17:26-17:30
Divorce is not God's optimal plan.
17:31-17:52
Divorce is wrong, but we're so quick to disregard a woman who has been abused or cheated on for years, who tried so hard to faithfully endure, maybe entered into a divorce that wasn't her choosing.
17:54-17:55
But we're quick to condemn.
17:58-18:00
We're quick to condemn parents.
18:01-18:15
"Your kids are out of control." "Look at him." "Her kids are always out of control." And then we find out that the kids are acting out because they experienced something traumatic.
18:16-18:28
And we don't see the countless hours of the parents trying to raise their kids, parents trying to get help for their kids to go through whatever it is they've gone through.
18:28-18:31
We don't see that. We don't care about that.
18:31-18:34
We're just so quick to condemn.
18:39-18:48
But you know, even for people like these scribes and Pharisees who didn't even believe in Jesus, experience has a way of putting things into perspective.
18:51-19:03
Jesus said, "Let him who is without sin "Among you, be the first to throw a stone at her." You know, that's one of the most misused verses in the entire Bible.
19:04-19:09
Because do you know how people want to use and quote this verse?
19:11-19:19
They want this verse to say this, "You know, we're all sinners, so we should never ever call out sin." Right?
19:19-19:23
Somebody tells you that what you're doing is wrong, what you're doing is sinful.
19:24-19:33
"Hey, hey, hey, he who is without sin cast the first stone." Like, only if you're sinless can you tell me about my sin.
19:33-19:37
And that is not what Jesus was saying at all.
19:39-19:48
The point here - listen closely - these men were all law and no grace.
19:48-19:52
Jesus wasn't saying judges have to be sinless.
19:54-20:02
And the Bible teaches so clearly that we as a church must address sin when there's sin in the church.
20:02-20:14
But, righteousness and judgment have to have this foundation of a spirit of grace.
20:16-20:21
Otherwise, our judgment becomes heartless.
20:23-20:27
Truthfully, it becomes hypocritical because we all need grace.
20:31-20:32
I want to make this clear.
20:32-20:37
Some people look at this passage and think that Jesus completely threw out the law.
20:38-20:43
That these men said, "Hey, the law says stone her, and Jesus says, 'Ahh! Who needs the law?
20:43-20:48
Just forget about it.'" and look a little closer, that's not at all what happened.
20:49-20:51
Jesus actually affirmed the law.
20:52-20:54
Here, did you see that?
20:55-21:02
In an amazing twist, Jesus said, "Okay, she should be stoned.
21:06-21:15
But I'm going to appoint the executioner." So, sinless guy, you get the first throne.
21:18-21:21
Jesus wasn't minimizing adultery.
21:24-21:29
Adultery is so destructive and so painful.
21:30-21:33
Adultery violates the marriage covenant.
21:34-21:36
Adultery destroys entire families.
21:36-21:39
Adultery does harm to children.
21:39-21:41
Adultery is horrible.
21:42-21:45
We've talked about that so much in the past.
21:47-21:48
Jesus wasn't minimizing that.
21:51-21:57
But to this group of self-righteous men, Jesus was saying, "Hey, you know what?
21:57-21:58
You're no better.
22:00-22:06
You're condemning a woman for adultery, but your hearts are full of hatred.
22:07-22:08
Your hearts are full of malice.
22:08-22:18
What kind of people would grab just a woman, not the guy, just a woman, what kind of men would drag a woman through the streets and dump her right here?
22:21-22:22
Treat her like that.
22:24-22:25
You're heartless.
22:27-22:30
Jesus wasn't minimizing sin, He was elevating grace.
22:32-22:42
Saying the reason you are so harsh to judge because you don't recognize your own need for grace, even though you need it just as much as she needs it.
22:45-22:54
And you know, church, I am, I am by far the worst sinner that I know.
22:56-23:00
I need Jesus Christ more than anybody that I know.
23:01-23:04
And I know this because I know what's in my heart.
23:06-23:07
How about you?
23:11-23:22
And when you and I fail to recognize that we are sinners saved by grace, we become just as harsh as these guys in this passage.
23:25-23:43
But, when we are constantly drinking in the grace of Jesus Christ, That river of grace flows out of our hearts, and we become much better ministers to others who need that same grace.
23:45-23:46
We all need grace.
23:47-23:53
Finally, but we don't often understand it.
23:54-23:55
Look at the last two verses for today.
24:00-24:05
Jesus stood up and said to her, "Woman, where are they?
24:07-24:16
Has no one condemned you?" She said, "No one, Lord." And Jesus said, "Neither do I condemn you. Go.
24:17-24:26
And from now on, sin no more." Jesus said, "Well, I guess the trial is over.
24:26-24:28
the jury all sort of disqualified themselves.
24:30-24:32
Jesus alone had the right to condemn.
24:33-24:37
Jesus alone had the right to throw a stone, and He chose to forgive her.
24:38-24:41
And some would look at this passage and say, "Wait, wait, wait a second!
24:42-24:44
She didn't confess her sin.
24:45-24:47
She didn't repent from her sin.
24:47-24:53
She didn't do nothing that the Bible says we need to do to turn from our sin and to receive forgiveness.
24:54-24:55
She didn't do anything.
24:55-25:03
"How can you say she's forgiven?" And I would reply, "You want to step in at this point of the story, really?
25:04-25:05
This is where you want to step in?
25:06-25:12
This is where you want to go look for a rock?" Jesus knew her heart, right?
25:13-25:16
We've seen that all through John, over and over.
25:16-25:18
Jesus knows what's in a person.
25:19-25:20
He knew what was in her heart.
25:21-25:23
He knew that she was repentant.
25:26-25:34
There's a big difference in the way you minister to someone who's repentant than someone who's rebellious in the church.
25:34-25:35
This is a whole other sermon.
25:37-25:54
But just to say, when someone who calls himself a believer in the church is guilty of sin, if that person comes repentant and says, I need help. I'm trying to do the right thing.
25:54-25:58
Would you please help me?" I will work with that person all day.
25:58-26:00
All month, I will work with that person.
26:01-26:12
But the person who calls himself a believer who is flagrantly in unrepentant sin refuses to turn from it.
26:14-26:16
The Bible says that person is no longer welcome in the fellowship.
26:17-26:18
Huge difference, right?
26:20-26:22
And this woman was obviously repentant.
26:24-26:25
Sin no more.
26:27-26:30
Jesus didn't excuse her sin.
26:31-26:31
Like, hey, you know what?
26:31-26:34
You had a rough childhood, so you're off the hook.
26:35-26:38
Jesus didn't have her embrace some victim mentality.
26:39-26:45
Like, well, you know, the reason you committed adultery is because of something your husband did a while back.
26:45-26:47
He didn't give her this victim mentality.
26:48-26:51
He didn't call it an alternative lifestyle or whatever.
26:52-26:53
Jesus, He called it sin.
26:55-26:59
And He said to walk away from that kind of living.
27:02-27:10
We often don't understand grace because we view it as permission to sin.
27:12-27:16
People say, "Well, I'm not saved by my conduct, My conduct doesn't matter.
27:19-27:21
That's spoken like someone who doesn't know Jesus.
27:22-27:30
That's spoken like someone who doesn't have God's Holy Spirit indwelling you, changing you into who God has called you to be.
27:31-27:37
Jesus Christ is not about, "Here's your magic ticket to heaven." Jesus Christ is about transformation.
27:42-27:48
Jesus said, "Sin no more." Sin no more.
27:50-27:58
You see, the point is, grace points us in a new direction.
27:59-28:03
Grace moves us in a new direction.
28:04-28:14
And Jesus didn't tell this woman, "Sin no more, so that you can avoid being executed by stones somewhere down the road.
28:16-28:17
And it's the same for us, church.
28:17-28:28
Our motivation for turning from sin just can't be boiled down to, "Hey, don't sin because you fear the consequences." Like this woman, it's this.
28:31-28:33
Turn from your sin because you met Jesus Christ.
28:35-28:40
Turn from your sin because you can never be the same after experiencing His forgiveness.
28:43-28:46
Well, the scribes and the Pharisees certainly brought the right question to Jesus.
28:48-28:53
It all boils down to, hey, how do you harmonize justice and mercy?
28:56-29:00
If God is just, this woman dies.
29:01-29:04
But if God is loving, she lives.
29:07-29:07
What's it going to be?
29:10-29:16
Well, the answer for her sin and for yours is the cross of Jesus Christ.
29:19-29:25
See, the cross of Christ is an intersection where God's justice meets God's mercy.
29:28-29:42
And Jesus eventually took Her place on the cross as He has taken yours, so that we could be forgiven and go and sin no more.
29:45-29:55
And along the way, what motivates me to seek to show grace to someone struggling with sin?
29:59-30:01
Well, it's because forgiven people forgive.
30:03-30:06
because forgiven people know His grace.
30:07-30:08
Let's pray.
30:09-30:13
Father in heaven, thank You for Your Word.
30:15-30:18
And I pray, Father, that Your Word would transform us.
30:21-30:33
As we all so readily acknowledge that we need grace, but sometimes, Father, we're a bit thick-headed that comes to the application of it.
30:36-30:41
Father, let us be people that live in Your grace and extend that to others.
30:46-30:58
That when we find ourselves in this story, we would show the compassion and restoration of Christ, not the hate-fueled judgment of these scribes and Pharisees.
31:00-31:12
Father, let us be people who represent You, who represent Your Son, by demonstrating that grace to others.
31:16-31:19
Thank You, Father, for the grace that You've shown us on the cross.
31:23-31:25
We pray these things in Jesus' name.
31:27-31:27
Amen.

Small Group Discussion
Read John 7:53 - 8:1-11

What was your big “take-away” from this passage / message?
In John 8:7, Jesus said, “Let him who is without sin among you be the first to throw a stone at her.” People often quote this to mean “we are all sinners, so it’s never right to call out someone’s sin.”
- Is this an accurate interpretation of this verse? Why or why not?
- How and when IS it appropriate to call out someone on their sin?
John 8:9 says the older ones walked away first. Why do you think that was? How does experience seem to temper inappropriate zeal?
Jesus told the woman to “sin no more” (John 8:11). How does knowing Jesus motivate us to walk away from sin?

Breakout
Pray for one another to grow in Jesus’ grace - and being gracious to others.

Jeff Miller

August 11, 2019

Walk Wisely

Walk Wisely: Seduction Destruction.

Jeff Miller

August 11, 2019

Walk Wisely

  
  Introduction:

  How to Avoid Destruction by Seduction (Proverbs 6:20-35):

Let God's Word direct you, not your Feelings. (Prov 6:20-24a)
Watch out for Bait.  (Prov 6:24b-25) 
Consider what it Will Cost you. (Prov 6:26-35).

The consequences are Inevitable. (Prov 6:27-29)
The consequences will get you no Pity. (Prov 6:30-31)
The consequences are foolishly Self-Destructive. (Prov 6:32-35)

Proverbs 4:26 - Ponder the path of your feet; then all your ways will be sure.

Moral Fences:

I will not ride alone in a car with someone from the opposite sex other than my spouse or immediate family member.
I will not counsel the opposite sex alone– in a closed room or more than once.
I speak often and publicly about my affection for my spouse, when s/he is present and when s/he is not.
I will compliment the opposite sex on character, not appearance.
I will give my spouse total access to my cell phone / computer.

Sermon Notes (PDF): BLANK
Hint: Highlight blanks above for answers!

00:00-00:04
Open up your Bibles with me please to Proverbs chapter 6.
00:04-00:05
Proverbs chapter 6.
00:06-00:09
Many of you might not know this, but I have another part-time job.
00:09-00:14
And true story, it is product testing.
00:14-00:18
We get products in the mail, and we try them out, and we do these surveys.
00:19-00:23
And then they give you a few bucks for your opinion, and you get free products.
00:23-00:26
We've got coffee creamer and foil and stuff like that.
00:26-00:35
But also, in addition to getting products in the mail, with this, they actually email me pilots for new TV shows.
00:35-00:38
A lot of times they're like an hour long, whatever, I just delete those.
00:38-00:45
But some of them are like 20 minutes long, and they'll pay you to watch the show and tell them what you think about it.
00:45-00:49
So this one show, I did watch it. It was like a 22-minute pilot.
00:49-00:56
And it was this guy, I can't remember his name, shame on me, But this guy, he basically was trying to be like the next Steve Irwin.
00:56-00:58
Do you remember Steve Irwin?
00:58-01:01
You know him talking about the crocodile hunter, Crikey and all that?
01:01-01:03
Okay, well this guy had kind of that thing going on.
01:03-01:10
So he had this film crew and he was like wading through this, he was like in the Amazon, he was like wading through this jungle.
01:11-01:17
And the gist of this show was he was, every episode, he was going to try to find an extremely rare animal.
01:17-01:23
And in this pilot episode, he was looking for this eel that was in the river, in the jungle, whatever.
01:23-01:25
And OK, so he's walking through.
01:25-01:26
And along the way, he finds other animals.
01:26-01:27
He's like, hey, check this out.
01:28-01:33
Well, he, at one point in the show, he's like, oh, oh, look at this.
01:33-01:34
Look at this.
01:34-01:38
And he reaches down, and he pulls out a python.
01:38-01:40
And he's holding the python.
01:41-01:44
And he's like, oh, this is such and such kind python.
01:44-01:47
And look at the coloration on this thing.
01:47-01:49
And oh, look at the markings on this thing.
01:49-01:53
And wow, this is a beautiful specimen of this python.
01:54-01:54
Wow.
01:54-01:57
Wow, what a great find to be able to find this.
01:57-02:01
I'm sure you know these kind of snakes, they constrict their prey.
02:02-02:08
And then all of a sudden, as he's talking, the snake's like, bites him right in the face.
02:09-02:12
And he pulls the thing off, and he's just bleeding everywhere.
02:12-02:14
And he's like, all right, we're going to take a break.
02:14-02:15
We'll come back.
02:15-02:18
And I think they're going to put a commercial in that spot.
02:19-02:23
But when they come back, he's all bleeding and they're bandaging him up.
02:23-02:27
I take the survey afterwards and it was like, what part of the show did you find the most interesting?
02:27-02:28
Like it wasn't the eel.
02:29-02:36
Well, in the same way today, we are going to be talking about something that you may be tempted to play with, but it's going to bite you.
02:37-03:00
Today, we are letting the word of God give us wisdom and warning to avoid getting involved in a relationship, a physical relationship, a sensual, romantic, emotional relationship with a person that you should be avoiding like a python in the jungle.
03:01-03:04
Proverbs talks about this so many places.
03:05-03:08
Proverbs 2.16, she's called the forbidden woman.
03:08-03:10
Proverbs 6.24, she's called the evil woman.
03:11-03:20
Proverbs 6.26, married woman, obviously married to someone else as indicated by Proverbs 6.29, she's called your neighbor's wife.
03:20-03:24
Over and over, Proverbs warns about getting involved with the wrong woman.
03:24-03:29
You're like, "What kind of sexist thing is this?
03:29-03:38
It's always the woman." Well, the reason it's written that way is because it's from the perspective of a father talking to his son.
03:39-03:43
That's why that terminology is used that way.
03:44-04:00
But listen, church, you have to catch the principles that are given in these passages because this certainly includes, ladies, ladies, watch out for the evil men who just want to use you.
04:01-04:02
You get the point.
04:03-04:05
It's a relationship that you know you should not be in.
04:06-04:11
It's a person you know you should not be involved with.
04:11-04:22
And Proverbs gives us many super serious warnings, and I am not overstating it when I say, listen, this message will save your life.
04:22-04:29
And I believe every time we get up to preach the Word of God, I look at every Sunday, like this is the most important sermon ever.
04:29-04:33
I'm feeling the weight of this one, and I encourage you to listen close.
04:33-04:34
This message will save your life.
04:34-04:39
All right, Proverbs 6, if you're taking notes, and I really encourage you to do that.
04:39-04:42
How to avoid destruction by seduction.
04:43-04:44
First of all, jot this down.
04:44-04:47
Let God's Word direct you, not your feelings.
04:47-04:50
Let God's Word direct you, not your feelings.
04:50-04:52
Look at verses 20-24.
04:52-04:53
That's where we'll pick up in the passage.
04:54-04:59
"My son, keep your father's commandment and forsake not your mother's teaching.
04:59-05:01
Bind them on your heart always.
05:01-05:02
Tie them around your neck.
05:02-05:04
When you walk, they will lead you.
05:04-05:06
When you lie down, they will watch over you.
05:06-05:08
And when you awake, they will talk with you.
05:09-05:18
The commandment is a lamp, and the teaching a light, and the reproofs of discipline are the way of life to preserve you from the evil woman.
05:19-05:20
Let's stop there for a second.
05:20-05:23
You need to let God's Word guide you, not your feelings.
05:23-05:26
I'm not going to spend a lot of time here today.
05:26-05:26
Why?
05:26-05:29
Because that was the whole sermon last week, right?
05:30-05:31
That was the whole sermon.
05:31-05:33
Get online, you can listen to it again.
05:33-05:34
Here it is.
05:34-05:39
You're either guided by the Word of God, or you're going to be guided by your feelings.
05:39-05:47
But when we talk about not getting involved with the wrong person, this is a decision that you have to make ahead of time.
05:47-05:49
You have to make this decision today.
05:49-05:58
"I'm not going to go down this road." Right now, somebody is sitting and saying, "This message doesn't really apply. I'm just going to tune out.
05:58-06:02
Think about something. This message doesn't really apply to me." Listen, it will.
06:02-06:09
It might not apply to you today, but it's going to come up in your life sooner than you expect.
06:09-06:10
This will apply to you.
06:10-06:12
And this is wisdom that you need now.
06:12-06:21
You need to be prepared now, because in the moment that you are enticed by the wrong person, if you are unprepared, it's going to be too late.
06:21-06:28
Verse 24 says, "To preserve you from the evil woman..." Note how God's Word isn't mincing words.
06:28-06:35
"What kind of woman is this? Tell me. What kind of woman is this?" And it's the same principle. What kind of man are we being warned against?
06:35-06:37
What kind? Evil!
06:37-06:41
She's just looking for a good time. She doesn't care about you.
06:42-06:46
He's just looking to be with you, but he doesn't really care about you, ladies.
06:47-06:54
Because when you are ruined, guys, when you are ruined, she is just going to move on to the next sucker.
06:54-06:55
She doesn't care about you.
06:56-06:58
There's two ways to arm yourself against temptation.
06:59-07:10
Number one, right here we saw, "You need to let the Word of God guide your conduct." Right? The commandment, verse 23, "The commandment is a lamp, and the teaching is a light." The Word of God needs to guide your conduct.
07:10-07:19
And also notice verse 20, "Keep your father's commandment, for saying, 'Let your mother's teaching.'" Parents, you need to be teaching this stuff to your kids, all right?
07:19-07:22
I got your back, and I want to assist you in that.
07:22-07:24
But this has to come from the parents.
07:25-07:28
Parents, you need to teach your kids how to let the Word of God be the guide.
07:29-07:35
The Word of God's guidance is the first way to arm yourself against temptation, and the second way to arm yourself if you are married.
07:36-07:46
If you are married, you arm yourself against the temptation from getting involved with the wrong person by having a really, really, really, really, really healthy marriage relationship.
07:46-07:51
Do you guys know what I'm talking about? If you know what I'm talking about, say "Amen." Okay, you know what I'm talking about.
07:52-07:57
If you're still not sure, we had a sermon on this years ago from Proverbs 5.15-20.
07:57-08:04
It's on our website. Just go to our website and do a search for a sermon called "Drink Up." Alright? Have a healthy marriage relationship.
08:04-08:06
But you need to let God's Word direct you, not your feelings.
08:06-08:10
Secondly, number two, jot this down, watch out for bait.
08:10-08:12
Get back to the text here, verse 24.
08:12-08:19
"Preserve you from the evil woman, from the smooth tongue of the adulteress." Did that sound smooth?
08:20-08:23
No, actually, Pastor Jeff, it sounds kind of dorky when you say it.
08:24-08:39
"From the smooth tongue of the adulteress, do not desire her beauty in your heart, and do not let her capture you with her eyelashes." See that? The smooth tongue, the beauty, eyelashes.
08:39-08:41
Don't let her capture you with her eyelashes.
08:41-08:44
See the eyelashes? They're like a Venus flytrap.
08:44-08:45
That's what her eyelashes are like.
08:46-08:48
It's interesting, you know, the eyes.
08:48-08:52
You can tell a story with your eyes just by the way you look at someone.
08:52-08:55
That's what he's saying to watch out for. Think of the cosmetics industry, ladies.
08:56-09:04
You know, how much cosmetics and mascara and eyeshadow, how much stuff is just about making your eyes pretty.
09:05-09:08
And there's nothing wrong with wearing makeup, but you see the point here.
09:08-09:13
Watch out for the lady that's trying to allure you with her eyes because it's all bait.
09:13-09:20
You see the smooth tongue, the beauty, the eyelashes, it's all bait, it's all worms on the hook, it's all cheese on the mousetrap.
09:20-09:24
It's things so enticing, that ultimately is going to cost you.
09:24-09:26
You remember, sin doesn't look hideous.
09:26-09:29
Sin always looks alluring. Always.
09:29-09:57
And when this woman is looking at you with this beauty in these eyes, you're going to think, "This is my lucky day." Ladies, when this guy coming on to you, you might be tempted to think, "Wow, he's noticing me, this is my lucky day." And it's no different than the mouse seeing the cheese on the trap and saying, "Wow, free lunch, this is my lucky day." You gotta watch out for the bait.
09:57-10:00
And number three, you gotta consider what it will cost you.
10:00-10:06
I'm gonna spend a lion's share of the time on this because this is what the text devotes the most attention to.
10:07-10:10
You need to consider what it will cost you, all right?
10:11-10:23
So right now, right now, if you're flirting around at work, online, you got some coy little thing happening on the side, my wife doesn't know about that.
10:23-10:28
You get this little playful thing with this girl at work.
10:28-10:32
If you're flirting around with that right now, you gotta seriously listen up.
10:32-10:33
Look at verse 26.
10:34-10:41
It says, "For the price of a prostitute "is only a loaf of bread, but a married woman hunts down a precious life.
10:41-10:42
There's a contrast here.
10:43-10:46
Obviously, he's not condoning prostitution.
10:46-10:50
What he's doing is he's contrasting the cost.
10:50-10:59
Literally, verse 26, literally what this means is if you get involved with a prostitute, you will be brought to a piece of bread.
11:00-11:03
It's just a figure of speech that means you'll become a beggar.
11:03-11:04
Again, it's a contrast.
11:05-11:08
In other words, you get involved with a prostitute, you're going to lose your wealth.
11:08-11:12
But if you get involved in an affair, you're going to lose your life.
11:13-11:30
If you're contemplating getting involved with or continuing physical, sensual, romantic, emotional, if you're involved in that, again, or considering it with the wrong person, maybe you're at the very beginning of that road, you need to make a major U-turn right now.
11:30-11:31
What are the consequences?
11:32-11:34
Let's talk about the consequences here for a couple of moments.
11:34-12:09
I'm going to read a passage from that bring their own inevitable penalty.
12:09-12:13
You carry fire close to your chest, you're going to get burned.
12:13-12:16
You walk on hot coals, your feet are going to get burned.
12:16-12:19
We sort of use a modern proverb like that, don't we?
12:19-12:21
If you play with fire, you what?
12:21-12:23
Get burned. That's what he's saying.
12:23-12:25
Oh, and you think you're going to be the guy that gets away with it.
12:25-12:27
You think nobody's going to find out.
12:28-12:29
You are so wrong.
12:29-12:33
You can be sure that your sin will find you out.
12:33-12:34
Maybe not today.
12:34-12:37
Maybe not this week, but it's going to happen.
12:37-12:39
When you play with fire, you're going to get burned.
12:39-12:41
The consequences are inevitable.
12:41-12:44
Letter B, speaking of consequences, you've got to jot this down.
12:45-12:46
The consequences will get you no pity.
12:47-12:48
Look at verse 30.
12:48-12:53
"People do not despise a thief if he steals to satisfy his appetite when he is hungry.
12:53-12:55
But if he is caught, he will pay sevenfold.
12:56-12:59
He will give all the goods of his house.
13:00-13:08
He who commits adultery lacks sense." Stop there. The consequences will get you no pity.
13:08-13:10
Again, he's not condoning stealing, okay?
13:11-13:20
Obviously, once again, he's contrasting the cost, the consequences of stealing versus the consequences of having an affair.
13:20-13:25
And the contrast here is pity versus disdain.
13:25-13:26
We get this, right?
13:27-13:29
Like, come on, if somebody's starving...
13:29-13:32
We know right off the bat, stealing is wrong, right?
13:32-13:34
I don't have to bark up that tree, do I, Mike?
13:35-13:36
We're convinced on that, right?
13:37-13:38
Eighth Commandment, "Thou shalt not steal," right?
13:39-13:56
We know it's wrong, but if somebody was starving and survival mode kicks in and they didn't ask for help or whatever reason and they're like, "I had to steal because I was starving." Let's be honest, we can sympathize with that to some degree, can't we?
13:56-13:57
I mean, who's with me on that?
13:57-14:00
We can sympathize for a starving guy, right?
14:00-14:03
Come on, just a couple of you? Gosh!
14:03-14:05
Next week's sermon is going to be on compassion, people!
14:06-14:09
If somebody's starving and they steal food...
14:09-14:11
Stealing is wrong, we established that.
14:11-14:17
If somebody's starving and they steal food, you're like, "Okay, that's wrong, but I can sympathize with that. The poor guy was hungry.
14:18-14:24
He was driven by survival, but an adulterer is driven by lust.
14:24-14:38
And there's no pity for that guy." So if you fall into this trap, You ignore this sermon and you decide you're gonna do your little flirty, coy thing on this and it comes back to bite you in the face like a python.
14:40-14:44
And I just gotta tell you, nobody is going to feel bad for you, alright?
14:44-14:50
Despite next week's sermon on compassion, nobody is going to feel bad for you.
14:50-14:57
You know, it's like, "Hey, where's Joe? Has anybody seen Joe around?" "Oh, you know, Joe, he cheated on his wife.
14:58-15:02
And he got kicked out of his house, and his wife is filing for divorce.
15:02-15:14
And Joe had to move in with his brother." "Oh, boo-hoo for Joe." "Yeah, I feel bad for his wife." "Oh, absolutely. If he has kids, I feel horrible for them." "I don't feel bad for that guy at all." And that's what Proverbs is pointing out.
15:14-15:19
The consequences, once this wrecks your life, nobody's going to care.
15:19-15:23
In letter C, the consequences are foolishly self-destructive.
15:23-15:28
Pick up in verse 32 again, "He who commits adultery lacks sense.
15:28-15:31
He who does it destroys himself.
15:31-15:34
The consequences are foolishly self-destructive.
15:34-15:40
He who commits adultery lacks sense." Boy, that is such a tactful way the Word of God puts it, right?
15:41-15:42
How would we say that?
15:42-15:44
Look, if you do this, you're stupid.
15:45-15:46
Okay? You're stupid.
15:46-15:47
You didn't think this through, did you?
15:48-15:49
You didn't think it through.
15:49-15:55
You had, when you started this, you didn't bother to think what the end game was going to be.
15:55-15:57
I'm starting down this road, where am I going to end up here?
15:57-15:58
How's this going to play out?
15:59-16:03
What's this little thing going to look like as it escalates and develops?
16:04-16:07
What's this going to look like in a month or in six months?
16:07-16:08
You didn't think that out, did you?
16:09-16:13
Nobody wakes up determined to destroy their lives.
16:13-16:23
Nobody wakes up and says, "You know what? I'm going to commit adultery today, and I'm going to lose everything - my marriage, my family, my ministry, possibly my job.
16:23-16:30
I'm going to have kids that are going to resent me for the rest of my life." Nobody wakes up and does that.
16:30-16:34
Read 2 Samuel 11 with King David. That's a whole other sermon.
16:35-16:47
It started with David being in the wrong place at the wrong time, and having a lustful look, and inquiring, and the next thing you know, the king of Israel is committing adultery with one of his soldier's wives and gets her pregnant.
16:47-16:49
And then he ends up murdering her husband.
16:49-16:51
And it was this whole thing.
16:51-17:00
But I guarantee you, David didn't wake up that morning and say, "I'm going to commit adultery today." It happens in these little gradual steps.
17:00-17:04
And you've got to knock off these little gradual steps, church.
17:04-17:08
It starts with the flirty Facebook post reply.
17:09-17:18
You know, you post some picture, "Oh, you're so beautiful." and some guy posts a picture like, "Oh, you're such a beefloaf.
17:18-17:19
Just look at you.
17:20-17:24
You're such-- oh, you're--" It starts with these little flirty Facebook replies.
17:25-17:26
That's what Aaron calls me.
17:27-17:28
Not really, just in my head.
17:28-17:34
But it starts with that little flirty Facebook thing, and then it turns into the suggestive text, OK?
17:34-17:35
Because that's not public.
17:35-17:37
That's just between two people now.
17:37-17:39
It's a little suggestive text.
17:39-17:43
And we're using these little double meanings of words.
17:43-17:44
and entendres or whatever that's called.
17:45-17:46
And it starts with the suggestive text.
17:47-17:50
And then it goes to the two personal email.
17:50-17:52
I'm sure glad I have you in my life.
17:52-17:55
I really appreciate you.
17:55-17:58
You're such a strong person for me and thank you.
17:58-18:00
And we start to get really personal.
18:00-18:04
I need to talk to you about something that I can't talk to my wife about.
18:04-18:08
And it progresses to a seemingly innocent touch.
18:08-18:10
We're testing the waters there.
18:10-18:14
Then we're finding an excuse to be alone together to talk, because you're such a good listener.
18:15-18:17
"He who commits adultery lacks sense." You didn't think this through, did you?
18:18-18:20
You know where this is going? Nowhere good!
18:20-18:21
Look at verse 33.
18:22-18:27
It says, "He will get wounds and dishonor." And look at this, guys.
18:27-18:33
"His disgrace will not be wiped away." You will destroy your reputation.
18:33-18:34
Now please hear me. Please hear me.
18:34-18:37
Can you be forgiven by God? Absolutely.
18:37-18:42
The glorious thing about the Gospel of Jesus Christ, He can forgive. He will forgive any sin.
18:42-18:44
It doesn't matter what you've done.
18:44-18:46
It doesn't matter how badly you've done it.
18:46-18:48
It doesn't matter how many times you've done it.
18:48-18:52
When you return and receive Jesus Christ by faith, He takes your sin away.
18:53-18:54
And you are pronounced not guilty.
18:55-18:57
That is the power of the Gospel of Jesus Christ.
18:57-19:00
Yes, you can be forgiven by God.
19:01-19:04
And if you're a Christian, you are forgiven by God.
19:04-19:06
Even if you do this.
19:06-19:14
But, though you are forgiven by God, You will never, this will never be forgotten by man.
19:14-19:15
You want some proof of that?
19:16-19:16
This is a meatball.
19:17-19:18
Remember President Bill Clinton?
19:19-19:23
Besides that, name something that his presidency was famous for.
19:23-19:24
I couldn't think of anything.
19:24-19:28
When you think of Bill Clinton, you think of one thing and one thing only, right?
19:29-19:31
And that's Monica Lewinsky, correct?
19:31-19:38
And I promise you, in 25 years, if you mention the name Bill Clinton, what are people going to associate with him?
19:38-19:39
Monica Lewinsky.
19:40-19:53
And I was thinking to myself this week, isn't it crazy that you can be the most powerful man in the world, President of the United States, and that's the only thing people are going to remember about you?
19:54-19:55
That you had an affair.
19:55-20:01
Because the Bible says, "His disgrace will not be wiped away." And you know people personally, I'm sure.
20:01-20:08
You know people personally who went down this path, And in your mind, you always associate this sin with that person.
20:08-20:15
It's sad, you know, obviously I look at things through my lens, and I think of ministry, right?
20:15-20:18
Of course, you read about the famous guys that blow it, right?
20:18-20:19
You read about that.
20:19-20:21
And I'm not even talking about that.
20:21-20:30
Aaron and I personally know four pastors, just off the top of my head, four, that got involved in an extramarital thing, and they lost everything.
20:31-20:39
One pastor was a very, very, very successful pastor of a very huge, very quickly growing church.
20:39-20:45
They had just opened a whole other campus because it was growing, and he threw it all away.
20:45-20:46
For what?
20:46-20:49
And you know what really bothers me about that?
20:49-21:08
With these pastors, when they got into ministry, they believed, "This is what God is calling me to do." They believed that they had a call from Almighty God to carry out this ministry, and they were willing to forfeit what they believed was a calling from God.
21:08-21:09
For what? For what?
21:10-21:15
Countless people have thrown away everything they've worked for, for a few minutes of pleasure.
21:15-21:26
And I want to ask you, if you're at the beginning of this road, if this is you, if this is starting to be a little salty for you, I want to ask you, is this how you want to be known?
21:26-21:29
as the guy who ruined his life because he couldn't control himself.
21:30-21:36
"Your disgrace will not be wiped away. Yes, you can be forgiven." That disgrace attaches itself to your name.
21:36-21:38
Look at verses 34 and 35.
21:39-21:44
It says, "For jealousy makes a man furious, and he will not spare when he takes revenge.
21:45-21:47
He will accept no compensation.
21:48-22:01
He will refuse, though you multiply gifts." Not only do you have the reputation danger and the ministry danger, You know, if you're messing around with a married woman, you have another problem, and that's a literal physical danger.
22:02-22:03
A literal physical danger.
22:04-22:08
Do you think anyone has ever assaulted or killed another man because of an affair?
22:08-22:11
Do you think that's ever happened? It happens all the time.
22:11-22:15
I mean, think about this, married men. Put yourself in the other position, married men.
22:15-22:27
Hypothetically speaking, married men, what if you leave work early, and you go home and discover that there was another man at your house spending romantic time with your wife.
22:27-22:29
Imagine that happened to you, man. How would you feel?
22:29-22:30
How would you feel?
22:30-22:31
What if...
22:32-22:32
Furious, right?
22:33-22:35
What if you walk in and you confront this man?
22:35-22:37
And he pulls out his wallet, says, "Look, I'm so sorry.
22:38-22:41
Will 20 bucks make it better?" Guys, will 20 bucks make it better?
22:41-22:46
What if he says, "Well, I got more money. I got more money." How about 100 bucks? Will that make it better, guys?
22:47-22:48
Guys, will that make it better?
22:49-22:53
What if he pulls out his checkbook and says, I'll write you a check for $5,000 right now.
22:53-22:57
Will that take away your anger?" Guys, will it?
22:57-22:59
That's exactly what he's saying here.
22:59-23:01
There's not a price tag on this, guys.
23:01-23:03
You're messing around with my wife.
23:04-23:08
You better be ready to face everything I've got and more.
23:09-23:11
And it doesn't matter what you offer.
23:11-23:19
So guys, if you're messing around with a married woman, her husband, when he finds out, and by the way, the Bible says he will find out, He's going to be just as vengeful.
23:21-23:28
And of course, there's some knucklehead right now listening to this message, like, "Oh, I'm not buying into any of this stuff, and I do got one of these things.
23:28-23:30
I'm not afraid of this lady's husband.
23:31-23:35
He's scrawny and I can take him." And there's probably some knucklehead hearing this and thinking that.
23:36-23:48
And I'm not saying that this angry husband is going to show up and challenge you to a Marquis de Queensberry rules of pugilism, or take off a glove and slap you and challenge you to a duel.
23:48-23:49
It might not work that way.
23:50-23:52
You know, Aaron and I, we've lived in a lot of different places.
23:52-23:53
Do you know what happened in one place we lived?
23:54-24:00
The neighbor across the street was having an affair with another man's wife who lived around the corner.
24:01-24:02
Well, that other man found out.
24:03-24:07
And he didn't show up at noon and say, "Put up your dukes." Do you know what he did?
24:08-24:10
He showed up in the middle of the night and set his house on fire.
24:11-24:12
So, if you're flirting around...
24:12-24:15
By the way, it's not funny, but it's kind of funny.
24:16-24:30
He set the guy's house on fire, this guy that his wife had an affair with, he set his house on fire, and then he stood out at the end of the driveway directing the fire trucks and EMTs, like, "Right here, here's the fire!" And I think maybe he thought that was his coverup.
24:30-24:31
Right, like, "No, it wasn't me.
24:31-24:36
"I was actually trying to help the fire department." By standing in this guy's driveway in the middle of the night.
24:36-24:44
Here's the point, guys, if you're flirting around, girls, you got some little side thing going on, there is absolutely nothing good that's going to come from it.
24:45-24:45
I'm going to close.
24:46-24:49
And I want to close by commending to you some moral fences.
24:50-24:54
These are some convictions that I encourage you to adopt to protect yourself.
24:55-24:58
This is not legalism, okay?
24:58-25:02
Legalism is a list of man-made rules that make you more spiritual.
25:03-25:05
God loves me more when I keep these rules.
25:05-25:07
That's what legalism is, and that's not what this is.
25:08-25:14
Legalism is judging someone based on a man-made set of rules, and that's not what this is.
25:14-25:20
You're like, "Okay, well then what is this?" These moral fences, it's making no provision for the flesh.
25:21-25:23
It's giving no opportunity for temptation.
25:24-25:28
It's living above reproach. 1 Timothy 3.2, Titus 1.7.
25:28-25:41
If you're looking for a Proverbs verse to sort of hang all of this upon, Proverbs 4.29, "Ponder the path of your feet, then all your ways will be sure." I want to encourage you to adopt these things.
25:42-25:43
Add some of your own.
25:43-25:47
These are convictions that I want you to adopt these to protect yourself.
25:47-25:51
I'm not enforcing this, obviously. I'm encouraging this.
25:51-25:52
The moral fences.
25:52-25:58
Number one, I will not ride alone in a car with someone of the opposite sex other than my spouse or an immediate family member.
25:59-26:05
Number two, I will not counsel the opposite sex alone in a closed room, or more than once.
26:05-26:09
I would add to that, this includes meeting alone for lunch or for coffee.
26:10-26:14
Just you and a member of the opposite sex who is not your wife or is married herself.
26:14-26:15
You get the point, right?
26:16-26:23
I counsel men, and I counsel married couples, and I will even counsel teens with their parents with them.
26:24-26:26
I will not counsel women. Why?
26:26-26:31
Remember I told you, Aaron, and I know all these pastors personally, you know where the affairs started? Counseling.
26:32-26:33
I don't counsel women.
26:33-26:45
If there is an extreme circumstance, which has happened a couple of times, I will counsel a woman one time with Aaron present or someone else present, one of the elders or somebody, one time.
26:45-26:50
And then I will connect you with another woman in the church or I will refer you to a female counselor.
26:50-27:00
Number three, I speak often and publicly about my affection for my spouse when he or she is present or when he or she is not present.
27:00-27:02
You gotta let people know you gotta keep that out there.
27:02-27:03
I am committed.
27:03-27:04
I am committed to my spouse.
27:04-27:05
I am committed.
27:05-27:10
Number four, I will compliment the opposite sex on character, not appearance.
27:10-27:13
Okay, compliment the opposite sex on character, not appearance.
27:13-27:16
You did a great job in your ministry.
27:16-27:19
Now you really have great compassion for children.
27:19-27:21
I appreciate the way that you teach or whatever.
27:22-27:26
Not, well, your hair looks really great that way or that dress looks so nice on you.
27:26-27:32
You can't plant seeds that could be interpreted as suggestive or flirty.
27:33-27:37
Number five, I will give my spouse total access to my cell phone/computer.
27:38-27:48
Your wife should have access to all forms of your electronic communication, whether it's texts, Facebook messages, email, whatever.
27:49-27:51
Guys, your wife should have total access to those things.
27:52-27:55
Ladies, your husband should have total access to those things.
27:56-28:03
Speaking of, personally I make it a practice of CCing someone else when I need to send a personal email to a female.
28:03-28:06
I'll attach my wife to it, I'll attach Brooke to it.
28:06-28:11
Sometimes Brooke's like, "Hey, why did you attach me to that email?" Just because I wanted a witness, right?
28:12-28:13
I've attached Mark Ward to emails.
28:14-28:15
I would commend that to you.
28:16-28:18
Give your spouse total access to your cell phone, computer.
28:19-28:22
Okay, you get the point. That was the introduction. Here's the sermon.
28:22-28:24
You can play it safe, or you can play with fire.
28:25-28:27
But as for me, my wife is worth it.
28:27-28:29
My testimony is worth it.
28:29-28:31
My ministry is worth it.
28:31-28:34
And most of all, my walk with Christ is worth.
28:34-28:35
How about you? Let's pray.
28:36-28:46
Father in Heaven, we live in a day more than ever where communication is so easy, and opportunities to get involved with the wrong person - it seems easier than ever.
28:47-28:49
Father, I pray for this church. I pray for myself.
28:49-28:59
That You would burn this sermon on our brains, is when we would be tempted to get involved in some little thing that we know we shouldn't.
29:00-29:02
I pray that You would bring these warnings to mind.
29:02-29:05
God, we thank You that You love us to give us these warnings.
29:05-29:09
God, we thank You that Your grace is greater than our sin no matter what.
29:09-29:12
Father, I pray today is that ounce of prevention.
29:13-29:23
I pray that today is a day that hearing this message, and when this goes online and people listen to it, I pray that You would use this to save lives.
29:23-29:26
Thank you, Father. We pray in Jesus' name, Amen.

Small Group Discussion
Read Proverbs 6:20-35

What was your big “take-away” from this passage / message?
List the consequences this passage lays out that people will face by getting involved in a wrong relationship.
If the danger is so obvious, and so devastating, why is this temptation so alluring?
What “moral fences” have you implemented to protect yourself?

BREAKOUT
Is there an inappropriate relationship that you have been flirting with? What do you need to do to repent?

Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery - Part 2

Introduction:

Two Problems Jesus Has with Divorce (Matthew 5:31–32):

Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery

Introduction:

Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery (Matthew 5:27-30):

Knowing Jesus - Knowing His Grace

Introduction:

We All Need Grace (John 8:1-11):

Am I a gracious person?

Walk Wisely: Seduction Destruction.

Introduction:

How to Avoid Destruction by Seduction (Proverbs 6:20-35):

Upcoming Small Group Questions CLICK HERE

How much of the Bible have we covered since 2011?

Introduction:

Two Problems Jesus Has with Divorce (Matthew 5:31–32):

Audio Transcript

Introduction:

Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery (Matthew 5:27-30):

AUDIO TRANSCRIPT

Introduction:

We All Need Grace (John 8:1-11):

Am I a gracious person?

Audio Transcript

Introduction:

How to Avoid Destruction by Seduction (Proverbs 6:20-35):

Audio Transcript